Total pages in book: 167
Estimated words: 164838 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 824(@200wpm)___ 659(@250wpm)___ 549(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 164838 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 824(@200wpm)___ 659(@250wpm)___ 549(@300wpm)
God, Lor, what were you thinking?!
“Thanks so much for the ride!” I fumbled for my keys. “And for your help. I-I already said that but thank you!”
Come on. Come on, where are you?
“You better get some rest!” I couldn’t stop speaking. “I know how tired you were earlier tonight. I’m so sorry you had to come get me!”
A-ha, finally!
Snatching my keys from the bottom of my little purse, I flicked through to find the right one only—
My nape prickled.
My heart pounded.
And Zander gently claimed my hips, then spun me around to face him.
Our eyes locked.
We both struggled to catch a breath.
He made me want to melt into the ground as he asked ever so softly, “Why are you running away from me?” His voice turned thick with gravel, sounding painfully familiar. “Is it because you’ve had a flashback from what Milton did or…”
I swallowed hard.
Don’t ask. Don’t you dare ask.
“Or?”
Dammit, Lor!
“Or because you thought I didn’t want you when every bone in my body is begging me to kiss you?”
My insides wrung inside out.
My heart turned into a chaotic butterfly.
I had no words.
Poof. All gone.
He stepped even closer. “Tell me why you were heading toward my house, not yours.”
I gulped.
I couldn’t.
I wasn’t that brave.
“Tell me why I feel like I did something wrong. That I just missed an opportunity that I’ve been waiting for forever.” He crowded me against my front door, sheltering me from the rain but not the storm he caused in my blood. His gaze dropped to my mouth. “Tell me to go, and I’ll go.”
Tell me to stop, and I’ll stop.
Zander’s voice blended with X’s in my head. So similar. So deep.
I couldn’t breathe as his fingers captured my chin and tipped my head back. With my spine against the door and his hips millimetres from pressing into mine, I couldn’t move as he hovered over my lips.
Our eyes locked; his glasses caught the light I’d left on for Peng. His mouth hovered over mine with delicious drawn-out torture.
I quaked in my soaking shoes and waited and waited and…couldn’t wait anymore.
Soaring up on my tiptoes, I smashed my lips to his.
He shuddered and collapsed against me.
The door creaked as our weight slammed against it.
I cried out as the knocker caught me right in the shoulder blade. “Oww—”
“Shit.” Wrenching away, his eyes flared with panic. “Damn, I’m so sorry. I…I didn’t mean—”
“It’s fine. It was just the kno—”
“It’s not fine. I got carried away. I just…fuck, I don’t know what I was thinking. He hurt you because of me. It’s too soon. I should never have—”
“Zander, it’s okay—”
“I would never hurt you, Sailor. You know that, right?” His eyes gleamed with fear and stress and guilt. His glasses slid down his nose only for him to shove them back into place. The tic was so him, so full of nerves, that any hope of him being X dissolved with the last of the rain.
I slouched against my door.
A chill crept into my heart.
I accepted that Zander might want me, but he was far too shy to claim me.
And I wasn’t ready to be the brave one. Not yet.
Turning around, I unlocked the door and stepped inside.
Dripping over the rug where I’d had my first panic attack, I looked back and forced a smile.
He hadn’t moved, keeping his hands balled at his sides as if he’d forgotten how to walk. “Sailor, I—” He wiped his mouth, removing any trace of our fleeting kiss. “There’s something I need to tell—”
“Not tonight.” I cursed the sting of tears. “We’ll both catch the flu if we don’t get dry. Look after yourself, okay, Zander? Sleep well.”
I closed the door and staggered back as the best kitten in the world leapt into my arms and attacked me with love.
Doing exactly what I’d hoped Zander would do but didn’t.
* * * * *
“So you kissed my twin tonight, huh?”
I smiled as X stepped through my kitchen and into my newly renovated living room. His brown eyes glowered above his skull-painted mask. His blue-black hair and eyebrow piercing made him the quintessential bad boy. A protective monster who stomped around in heavy boots and made me break apart on his fingers.
I stretched on the new couch, bold and far too brazen. “Who? You mean Zander?” I shrugged with a wink. “I can’t help that I like you both.”
Stalking toward me, X reclined against the threshold. “Did you stop to think that it would make me jealous?”
The faintest coil of worry worked through me. “Can you be jealous when I was hoping you were the same person? I didn’t realise he was your brother.”
He sniffed coldly, cruelly. “And now that you know we’re not the same…what are you going to do? Be with me or him?”
I sat up, fear prickling down my spine. “You’re the one who broke up with me, remember?”