Total pages in book: 95
Estimated words: 85183 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 426(@200wpm)___ 341(@250wpm)___ 284(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 85183 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 426(@200wpm)___ 341(@250wpm)___ 284(@300wpm)
I press my lips to hers in an attempt to help her feel what I cannot say. The heat of her soft lips floods my skin. My fingers dig into her leg, and I fight every urge I have to throw her down and take her.
Her tongue skims my bottom lip, and her fingers tighten on my shoulders as she presses her body harder over mine. I allow my hands to travel up her sides to her neck, scratching my fingers up into her hair as I kiss her deeper. Her hands drop to my belt buckle. I notice them tremble as she yanks at it. She's desperate, her movements jolty, and I realize I just can't do this with her. I release her hair and break away from her.
"Tor," I say quietly, stilling her hands. Her chin drops to her chest. "I just need you to be—"
"It's fine. You don't want me. I get it." She pushes off of me and staggers to her feet.
I rub my hand over my forehead. I'm annoyed because I don't know what the fuck to do with her. I go too far, and she loses her shit, I don't go far enough and she thinks I don't want her.
She goes to walk away, but I grab her by the wrist. I stand and push her against the desk. I'm not going to do this with her. She makes an attempt to shove me away, but I don't budge. She's breaking, and I can see it. I'm done letting her fucking go off and break by herself. I pull her back to me, and she pushes me away again. This time, I give a little but refuse to let go of her waist. She fights me, pounding her fists over my chests, her fragile body shaking underneath my grasp.
"Fuck you, Jude!"
The next thing I know, a loud slap rings out, and I feel the sting across my cheek.
I blow out a calming breath and take it, gritting my teeth. My fingers instinctively flinch into her waist. "Tor..." I growl. "I am not the person you're fucking mad at." Her fingers fist my shirt, and then she breaks. Her eyes slam shut, and her body trembles as a ragged sob tears from her throat. I will do anything for her, be anything to her, but I'll admit, I don't know how to help her with this. I grab her, cupping the back of her head as I bring her to my chest and hold her.
"Whatever you need, doll," I mumble into her hair. "I'll give you whatever you want, whatever you need, as long as it is what you need." She buries her face in my chest; her fingers balled in my shirt. "Look at me," I whisper.
She tilts her face up. Her cheeks are slick with tears, and I swipe my thumbs underneath her eyes to wipe away the remaining tears. How could she possibly think that I don't want her? I've never wanted any damn woman the way I want her. She fucking owns me, and she's completely unaware of it. I shake my head gently as I scoop her up into my arms. "I'm gonna take you to bed."
I carry her through the cabin, slowly climbing the stairs to the bedrooms. I pull in the scent of her hair just before I lay her on the bed. That smell is so familiar, so fucking undeniable. "What do you want me to do, Tor?" I ask as I sit on the bed next to her.
She bites her bottom lip, refusing to look at me. "I just don't want him to be the last person to..." her voice breaks. She draws her knees up to her chest, resting her elbows on them and burying her face in her hands.
Fuck. I drag my hands down my jaw trying to decide if this is really what the hell she needs. I rub my hand along her spine. "You are absolutely sure you want me to do this?"
She silently nods. "This is something only you can fix, Jude," she whispers.
I swallow hard, and gently pull her into my lap, wrapping her legs around me. Our eyes lock, and I'm fucking terrified I'm going to hurt her. I press my forehead against hers and close my eyes as I trail my fingers up and down her neck. "You tell me if you want me to stop."
She nods, and I rise from the bed, holding her as I gently lay her back on the bed and hover over her. I inhale as I skim my lips up the side of her throat, over the thick scar beneath her jaw. Her quickening pulse thumps against my lips. Her fingers comb through my hair as her breaths become uneven. I nervously trace my hand up the inside of her thigh, pushing the hem of her skirt up as I go. My finger brushes between her legs and she freezes, her breath catching. Her grip on my hair tightens nearly to the point of pain. I pull back to look at her. Her head is thrown back against the pillow, her eyes squeezed shut, every muscle in her body tense as hell.