Total pages in book: 71
Estimated words: 69098 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 345(@200wpm)___ 276(@250wpm)___ 230(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 69098 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 345(@200wpm)___ 276(@250wpm)___ 230(@300wpm)
No comfort. Solutions.
“Dad,” I murmur. “I don’t want to. I want to stay here.”
He sucks in a deep breath before exhaling his words. “It’s not a request, Ryder.”
Not a request.
The finality in his words is a punch to the gut. It knocks the breath right out of me. My lungs ache from lack of oxygen, making me grow dizzy.
This can’t be real.
I’m being exiled. Just like that. Without even acting on anything with Raegan, but for simply thinking it. I gulp in a gasp of air and attempt to find my words again.
“Ronan will hate town life,” I argue, voice growing shrill with panic. “You saw what it did to Rowdy. I can handle it, but Ronan can’t. He needs you guys.”
I need you guys.
I choke back a sob that threatens. Hysteria is sucking me into its void, drowning me mercilessly.
“Ronan’s not going.” Dad’s words are clipped and final. “Just you, Son.”
Quiet rushes in around us, growing deafening with each passing second. Just me. Not me and Ronan? Does he know about Ronan preferring men?
“That’s not fair,” I blurt out. “Why just me?”
I’ll be damned if I out Ronan about his sexuality, but I also can’t lie down and take this injustice.
“Ronan’s different as you’ve said. I don’t have to worry about him.” He pauses, letting that sink in before continuing in a gruff voice. “He’s not the one who needs the exposure to new people.”
“Dad, please.” My bottom lip wobbles and I’m thankful for the darkness so he can’t see the edge of an emotional breakdown. “Dad…”
“I understand this hurts. You’re so close to your siblings. This isn’t forever, Ryder. This is for now. You come back to us when you’re ready.”
After you find a woman who isn’t your sister.
That’s the part he leaves off but is heavily implied.
“What if I come back ruined like Rowdy?” I ask, voice cracking.
“He’s not ruined,” Dad growls as he stands. His hand clamps down on my shoulder and he squeezes. “There’s nothing wrong with your brother. He’s just no longer naive to the world. You, my son, still have so much to learn. Take this opportunity and use it well.”
He releases me and then leaves me alone with my misery.
My pain is covered in shame like the wetness of the forest—saturating every part of it, even down to the buried roots. There’s no hiding from it.
I’m being banished.
Robbed of happiness and love.
I’ll come back ruined.
If I ever come back.
* * *
* * *
A rumble, loud enough to make the windows rattle in the big house, tugs me from my ultimate boredom of folding laundry. I abandon the pile of towels to rush out the door. There are people everywhere—just not my favorite people.
Ronan and Ryder and Dad are still gone.
The deep, grumbly sounds are vibrations from music and an engine. Someone’s coming.
Racing across our yard, I steer clear of Mya, though we both manage to flash each other the bitchiest glares we can muster. The guy on guard duty is frowning my way but hasn’t left the safety of the closed gate. I rush past him, flinging myself out of the protection of our home and into the wilderness beyond it. Ignoring the man who calls after me, I hoof it to the edge of the fence and onto the road to wait, hands on my hips as I squint at the road.
The vibrations and rhythmic beat of bass grow closer and closer until a metal beast rounds the bend. I recognize the obnoxious truck—all shiny chrome, sleek black paint, and tires every bit as tall as me.
Wild.
Wild Knox, my betrothed.
Not really, but if our parents had it their way, we’d have fallen in love the second we laid eyes on each other.
Love is the furthest thing from either of our minds.
Yet, I still wait eagerly for his annoying ass to arrive. I need normalcy, and with Wild, I can guarantee he’ll be his usual antagonistic self, which for once is welcomed.
Anything to stop thinking about our visitors and the drama they’ve brought with them.
I wait in the middle of the dirt road, nearly overgrown with brush, as Wild’s truck becomes clearer in the distance. The engine roars as he speeds up. I know he can see me, which is why we’re now engaged in a game of chicken.
Me against his massive metal beast.
Standing my ground, I lift one hand from my hip, thrusting it into the air in front of me to wave my middle finger at him. It’s my usual welcoming gesture whenever I see him. He responds by gassing it, no doubt taunting me to move.
At this point, I’d almost be thankful for him to put me out of my misery.
Flatten me like a pancake.
He’d get his ass whipped so bad by both our dads.
I remain rooted in place, not wavering despite the speed at which he’s approaching. My heart leaps into my throat and it takes everything in me not to move. The truck grows larger and louder with each passing second.