Total pages in book: 91
Estimated words: 87368 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 437(@200wpm)___ 349(@250wpm)___ 291(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 87368 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 437(@200wpm)___ 349(@250wpm)___ 291(@300wpm)
No, I have to approach him. I have to tell him to fuck off. But knowing I have to leaves me feeling like I’m being ripped in two. Has he already called my parents? Does Ingrid know he found me? What the hell am I supposed to do? My stomach cramps in on itself as I lean my forehead to my knees, and my eyes burn with unshed tears. There isn’t a night that passes that I don’t cry for my life back in South Carolina.
But I can’t go back.
Not now.
Not ever.
CHAPTER FOUR
Three years earlier…
While we’re both in our early twenties, I can’t help but admit that I love the TikTok trend of kissing your best friend. I have watched the videos endlessly, giggling and getting all gooey inside when the guy is shocked at first when his best friend’s lips meet his. But then he regains his wits before going back for the real kiss, devouring the girl he has lusted after too. The jealousy is real as I watch, wishing I had the guts to do it. To make a move.
Because I have been in love with my best friend since we were eight.
I know what you’re thinking. Audrina, there is no way. An eight-year-old can’t fall in love, but I did. Head over heels in uncontrollable love for Thatcher Orlov. The story, it’s a cutesy one, so brace yourself. We were on vacation at Disney. My parents and his wanted to take us on a trip before Maeve got too big with the new baby that was coming. They hadn’t planned on having another baby, but we were all excited for the surprise. Our moms had chosen matching shirts for us to wear, and we had different mouse ears for each day. We had ridden all the rides, and everything was grand, but for some reason, I got scared of the Haunted Mansion.
Crazy, right? Not even babies get scared. I didn’t voice my concerns, but somehow Thatcher knew. He grabbed my hand and leaned in, his lips right by my ear. “It’s all fake. Kinda funny, don’t you think?”
I met his eyes, the lights playing off his face and leaving me unable to form words. Everything disappeared—the fear in my soul, the spooky noises, and nothing mattered but his dark gaze that settled on mine. He squeezed my hand, urging me to agree, and I did. I nodded, my throat working as he gave me a wide grin. “Yeah.”
“Yeah,” he agreed, pressing his body to mine, and I leaned right into him.
Like I was made to be pressed to his body.
Like two magnets.
When we got off the ride, he used the rest of his Disney gift card to buy me a Mickey ice cream bar. And on every ride after, he held my hand. It reminded me of my mom and dad. How my dad never let my mom walk without their fingers threaded together. Even at a young age, I knew I wanted a man who loved me the way my dad loved my mom. For me, Thatcher was just that.
So, I’m sure you’re wondering why I think I have to use a TikTok challenge to kiss my best friend. At this point, it is written in the stars that we are meant to be together, but he’s never treated me as anything other than a sister. He’s never looked at me with a hungry gaze. He’s never made a move or flirted in a way that’s made me think he wants me to be more than a best friend.
When people assume we’re together, he’s the first to correct them. When I think he’s looking at me with lust in his eyes, I convince myself it’s all in my head because he’s never made a move. We cuddle and even sleep in the same bed, and neither of us has ever made a move.
I don’t know if it’s the fear of the unknown or if he truly doesn’t see me as more than a friend, but I can’t live in limbo anymore. After I slept with his teammate, Dart, a huge, drunken mistake, he lost his damn mind. I mean, he yelled, he ripped me apart verbally, and he didn’t talk to me for a month. Only texted me for things we both needed and when it was time to pay bills. He was pissed, and I didn’t understand why. Sure, I slept with a teammate, but who cared?
I’m not his. But then…what if I am?
I want to be.
When I asked why it bothered him so badly, he just said it did and not to do it again. I almost fought him on it, but I didn’t want to hurt him again. Sleeping with Dart had done that.
I had created a whole narrative in my head of him being hopelessly in love with me like I am with him. It’s come time to find out if I’m right.