Total pages in book: 76
Estimated words: 76759 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 384(@200wpm)___ 307(@250wpm)___ 256(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 76759 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 384(@200wpm)___ 307(@250wpm)___ 256(@300wpm)
But twenty-two…
“I’m flattered,” I tell her. “But you deserved something better.”
“Did I? You made it wonderful for me, Jesse. Even after you were angry because you felt I deceived you. You still gave me four orgasms and a night I’ll never forget.”
I did, but I wasn’t being altruistic. Sure, there was a part of me that felt guilty and wanted to give her a better loss of her virginity than a quickie. But another part of me? I did it because I wanted to. Pure and simple. Sure, my first instinct was for a hookup, to get the release I so craved. But making love to Brianna, giving her orgasms, was absolutely no hardship at all.
I grab my jeans and shirt, begin to dress. “I’m glad you enjoyed yourself. But I have a job to do on this trip. The future of the band hinges on our success on this tour. So this thing—whatever it is—between us? It’s over, Brianna. It’s over.”
Chapter Twenty-Seven
Brianna
I will not cry.
I’ve been kicked in the shins hard by a balking steer, and I swallowed the pain. Never cried.
I never cried when I was learning to ride a horse as a kid and got thrown onto the hard Colorado clay dirt.
Never cried.
But the pain I feel now is nothing like the physical pain I subject myself to working daily on the ranch.
It’s like Jesse opened up my chest, took my heart in his hands, and squeezed the life out of it.
I can’t make him feel something for me.
But I did get what I wanted out of this.
I’m no longer a virgin.
I was the last of the awesome foursome to succumb, even though they don’t know that. They always assumed I’d slept with previous boyfriends, and I just let them believe it. It was easier that way.
I lie back down on the bed, still naked.
Jesse walks to the bathroom, picking up his shoes on the way. I hear the water running. Then I hear the toilet flush. He emerges from the bathroom fully clothed, his eyes sunken, dark circles still surrounding them.
I didn’t think I could possibly feel worse after his rejection, but I do. I did this to him. He needs sleep, but he’s not going to get any. Now he feels this overwhelming guilt, and that is all my fault.
He’s feeling like he’s the worst person who’s ever lived, but that’s not true. I’m the worst person who’s ever lived.
I got what I wanted, but now I’ve given us both so much guilt—so much guilt, right as we’re about to embark on a months-long tour together.
A tour that could make or break Jesse’s career.
I gulp. “Jesse…”
“Good night, Brianna.”
He walks out of the bedroom, and I hear the door to the suite close.
“I’m sorry,” I finish.
Then I let the tears come.
I wake up to my phone buzzing. For a moment I don’t know where I am, until I remember…
The ache between my legs reminds me.
Jesse was right. I’m sore.
Where the hell is my phone? Probably in my purse. I dart my gaze around the room and find it sitting on the floor near the door of the bedroom.
It has stopped buzzing by then, and I have a voicemail. From Maddie.
“Oh my God, Brianna, where are you? I woke up and you’re not here. Please call me as soon as you get this. In the meantime, I’m throwing on some clothes, and I’m going to look for you.”
What am I going to tell Maddie? I sure as hell can’t tell her I spent the night in a suite with her brother. That’s not even true. Jesse left in the middle of the night.
But I can’t let her go on being frantic. I call her back.
“Oh my God, Bree!” she gasps into the phone.
“Hi, Mads. I’m okay.”
“Where the heck are you?”
“I…got up early. Came down for coffee.”
“Your bed is still made.”
“I know. I made it.”
She huffs into my ear. “Brianna, why are you lying to me?”
“Oh, Maddie…” The lump in my throat grows larger. “Please don’t push me on this. My heart’s not in it. All you need to know is that I’m okay, and I’m coming back right now.”
“Brianna…”
“Please, Maddie. I’ll tell you everything when I’m ready. Just please… Don’t push this right now.” I choke back a sob. “I just can’t.”
“Oh my God. Are you crying?”
“No,” I lie. “I’ll be back in a moment.”
I get my clothes on, go into the bathroom, wash my face, getting rid of the raccoon eyes leftover from my mascara. I don’t bother fixing my makeup after I wash it off because I don’t really care. I run a comb through my hair. I’ll take a shower in my own room, where all my products are.
I leave the bathroom, the bedroom, and the suite. I gaze back into the large living area before I close the door for good.