Total pages in book: 135
Estimated words: 128061 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 640(@200wpm)___ 512(@250wpm)___ 427(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 128061 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 640(@200wpm)___ 512(@250wpm)___ 427(@300wpm)
“Pity,” she said lightly, and while it sounded sincere, it was probably just another smoothing technique.
“I’m not the monster you think I am,” he said. “I’m really not.”
“I don’t think you are a monster, Brochan. You think you’re the monster. I think you’re a man with a scarred heart and a really hard past. A man who’s trying to find his way. I am a woman who’d very much like to help him do that.” She paused for a long beat. “I will tell you this once, and then I will never mention it again unless you want me to.” The pause was briefer this time. “You could not have saved your pack. I’ve looked into it. You could’ve asked for help from nearby packs, but if you’d done that, they would’ve died too. The number of mercenaries and the number and level of mages who attacked your remote pack were too many. They knew this.”
“We could’ve run,” he countered. “We could’ve left.”
“They figured you would, actually. I pulled up the mercenary orders. They assumed you’d run and had a plan to pick you off when you did. Instead you stayed and took way too many of them down with you.”
He stiffened.
“Sorry,” she murmured. “That was in their reports. They concluded that the attack came at too high of a cost for them. The battle leader was killed. Regardless, you couldn’t have saved your pack. It’s the same fate that has befallen many shifter packs across the country.”
“Everyone I loved died, damn it!” he ground out. “I said I would protect them, and they died.” His voice broke and he hated himself for it. “I should’ve died with them.”
“But you didn’t,” she said. Her tone was so soft. So understanding. “You lived. And now you have a duty to your family to continue living. Your mate and kids wouldn’t want to see you so unhappy. Healing takes time, I know that, but it’s a better journey than this continued purgatory you’re forcing yourself into now.” She looped her arms around his neck, hugging him tightly. “In the meantime, work with us to ensure mages can’t keep doing this. Work with us to stop all of this so you can finally find some peace.”
He nodded and took a deep breath, trying to find some shred of control.
“What do you need from me to find that happiness?” she asked. “What can I do to help you?”
His heart was so heavy. So broken. He wouldn’t be able to hide the desperation in his next words if he’d tried.
“I need a friend,” he admitted. “I need guidance back into the world of the living. I need your sunshine.”
“The good ol’ friend zone, huh?” She kissed his cheek and squeezed him. “I am that friend, Brochan.”
He held her tightly for a little longer, needing a port in the storm.
“This wasn’t how I saw this dinner playing out,” he murmured.
“How did you see this dinner playing out?”
He blinked rapidly a few times, his gaze sliding to the side. “You caught me—I’m not really sure. Normally, I guess. Like a normal dinner party.”
“She invited Edgar.” Nessa cocked her head. “Edgar. How normal could it possibly have gone?”
“This is true.”
She got off his lap. “The good news is, you won’t have any normalcy in this town to compare to your old life. You just won’t find it. So if we can get past the front door and to Edgar, I’m pretty sure you’ll find plenty of reasons to never host a dinner party again.”
He stood, grateful.
“You must be a guardian angel,” he whispered.
She shook her head sadly. “No. I am the monster you envision yourself to be, Brochan. And the worst part is, I have zero guilt about it. Being morally gray keeps me alive.”
THIRTEEN
Austin
Austin gently pulled his arm from under Jess and slowly removed himself from the warmth of her body. The production cairns were due in today, and he needed to get his territory prepared.
He paused by the new table sitting in front of the window, glancing out at what he knew would be a big difference in the view.
The hedge maze was gone.
Somehow, Mimi had convinced Edgar to let it go in favor of a more cohesive gardening plan, all without Edgar’s threatening to retire himself.
The decision hadn’t been without its issues, however. Edgar hadn’t wanted to witness its destruction, so he’d slept last night, a rarity for him, and would wake up to find it gone today. How he’d react was anyone’s guess.
Austin grabbed a shower and then made his way downstairs.
“Good morning, sir,” Mr. Tom said as Austin walked in. “Fine morning, isn’t it? Which kind of coffee would you like? Espresso, Americano, caramel macchiato? Or what about something different today, like a chai tea? I’ve just learned how to make it. Very easy, really. I have oat milk, regular milk, unsweetened almond milk if you’re watching the waistline…”