Series: Fever Falls Series by Riley Hart
Total pages in book: 96
Estimated words: 92704 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 464(@200wpm)___ 371(@250wpm)___ 309(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 92704 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 464(@200wpm)___ 371(@250wpm)___ 309(@300wpm)
He winked, and we said our goodbyes and hung up.
It was just the chat I’d needed with him. We were both taking this in stride, seeing where it led. It was an odd place to be with a man—really, anything more than a hookup was weird for me—but there was something exciting about how uncertain I was about it all. Not knowing where it would lead, but being fine with that as long as my ass had business to finish with Sawyer’s cock.
CHAPTER SIXTEEN
Sawyer
College isn’t what I expected it to be. I’m not who I wanted to be.
~ Sawyer’s Journal, 20 years old.
Fearless was always the place where my thoughts ran wild. Actually, that was a lie. My brain was often on overtime, stressing about what other people were thinking, or if I was being too stuffy, or not quite fitting in the way everyone else around me did. The older I got, the better I was at burying that shit, or not giving a damn about it, but I’d been thinking about it more lately—how I was, compared to everyone I knew.
There was no question where it was coming from. I knew it was because I liked Carter, as fucked as that was. It sure as shit had come as a surprise to me. It wasn’t something I would have ever expected, and liking him made me question myself the way I had in high school and college. Carter wasn’t to blame. There was nothing he did to make me feel that way. No, that was all me. Because the truth was, Julian had torn me down, but Carter built me up.
It was strange how sometimes—like when I bit him in the car, or when we fucked around at his apartment, or even when I kissed him outside of Fever—it was like my brain shut off. I wasn’t thinking and just went off instinct, without realizing I was doing it. But then there were moments like when we FaceTimed after his party in Paris, when I tried to be flirty and assertive but thought I came off looking like an idiot.
Still, Carter liked that kind of shit—men like that—and he seemed to like it when I was flirtatious and direct with him about sex. And I tried like hell to sound like I knew what I was talking about and not freaking the fuck out when we were discussing screwing around and what the others thought about it.
I didn’t know what I was doing, but the more I talked to Carter, the more I wanted him, so I was going with it.
“Sawyer?” Lizzy called out to me, and I noticed I’d been spacing off.
“Yeah? What’s up?” I walked down the true-crime aisle and looked around the corner.
“It’s time for me to go. I have a class soon.” Lizzy was a full-time college student, only working part-time at Fearless. “Did you need anything else from me?”
“Nah, you can head out. Thanks for your help.”
She pushed her blonde hair behind her ear. “It’s my job.”
“Thanks anyway,” I replied. Lizzy gave me another smile and left.
For the hundredth time, I checked my cell, though since Lizzy just left, I knew exactly what time it was. Carter was fucking with my head, and I didn’t like it. Okay, maybe I liked it a little bit because I felt… Fuck, I felt like everyone else for a change. I played it off well, like I didn’t give a shit when my friends were talking about guys or dating or fucking, but spending time with Carter made me wonder if I cared more than I realized.
And he was coming home tonight. Well, not home, but back to Fever Falls. I would be smart to remember this wasn’t his home, and he didn’t want it to be. Still, after a whole day of flying, he was coming over to my place for dinner. I’d told him we could plan it for the next day, but he’d said no, that he wanted to come, so yeah, that was what had me on edge.
Fearless was busy most of the day. When the two evening-shift staff members got there, I gave them a list of things that needed to be done and let them know they could reach me on my cell if they needed me. From there, I made a quick trip to the grocery store, where I got the stuff for rosemary chicken, rice pilaf, and my famous Brussels sprouts. I picked up a bottle of rosé, figuring Carter might want to relax with some wine after traveling.
God, I was a mess. Jittery and nervous, which was ridiculous and pissed me off. When I got home, I took half an anxiety pill, showered, and started dinner.
At seven my doorbell rang, and I realized I was smiling. Fuck, this was bad. So goddamned bad. What was it about him that got me so worked up?