Total pages in book: 86
Estimated words: 85484 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 427(@200wpm)___ 342(@250wpm)___ 285(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 85484 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 427(@200wpm)___ 342(@250wpm)___ 285(@300wpm)
“Hurry.”
Grinning, I run a hand up his leg. “You have to kickstart this fake—”
“Real.”
“—relationship by burying your face between my legs.”
The heat in his eyes nearly burns me. “Lie back and spread ’em.”
So I do.
16
PIPPA
“You look glowy today.” Shelly leans against the doorway to my office with a vase of bright pink roses in her hand. “Have a good weekend?”
If I wanted to pretend I wasn’t on cloud nine, I couldn’t.
“Something like that,” I say, unable to wipe the smile off my face. “How was your weekend?”
“Considerably worse than yours, it seems.” She walks in and sets the vase on my desk. “I saw these in the reception area when I walked by, so I grabbed them for you.”
Damn you, Jess.
“Do you have a new guy in your life, or are these from the ex-husband?” she asks.
“The ex-husband.” I take the envelope out of the blooms. “We had an interesting weekend.”
“If you get flowers and a glow like that—tell me where I can get that kind of an interesting weekend. In my world, interesting weekends are when you have a funny smell in the refrigerator and aren’t quite sure where it’s coming from.”
I laugh and open the card.
Pippa,
I hope you have an amazing day.
You’re beautiful.
I’m thinking about you.
I can’t wait to see you tonight.
Jess
This man.
My heart sings. I could twirl around my office like a character on a silly musical—holding out my arms so little animals can hop on them and harmonize with me on a catchy melody.
“Did things change between you when you asked him to go on the retreat?” she asks.
“Something like that.”
“Well, I’m jealous. I haven’t had a man in my life for months now.” She sighs. “I wonder sometimes if you can go too long without a man. Like, is this the start of turning into an old maid? At what point do I start yelling at people to stay off my lawn?”
I laugh. “I think you have a while to go before you’re swatting a broom at the neighborhood kids.”
“I don’t know. I’ve been eyeing kittens at the shelter.”
“What does that have to do with anything?”
“Cats are always a part of the old maid storyline,” she says. “It’s long hair, a broom, usually a wart on the nose, but I’d like to forgo that detail, if possible. There’s also a small garden with pie plates hanging to scare away the birds and a cat.” She furrows her brow. “You know, if there’s a cat involved, why do they need the pie plates? Wouldn’t the cats keep the birds away?”
I snort. “What’s gotten into you?”
“Not your ex, that’s for damn sure.”
My ex.
Jess made it abundantly clear that he’s not to be referred to as my ex-husband anymore. He can be my boyfriend, my man, or my lover. For the next seven days, we are the fakest real item the world has ever seen.
I must admit that it’s fun. He’s leaned all the way into his new role with a gusto that’s been lacking in my life. He gave me a massage, cooked me carbonara for dinner, and watched an episode of my favorite show—well, most of it. I ended up giving him a blow job before the show was over to repay him for the oral he expertly delivered earlier in the night.
And when it was time to go home, he lobbied for me to stay. If we were really dating, he said, I’d already have half of his closet filled with my things. So in all fairness, I should just sleep over.
Except there was more talking, laughing, and kissing than sleep. But who’s complaining?
Chuck. I smell his hyena stench well before I see him. I make a face, unable to control my visceral reaction to the odor. Shelly’s confused until Chuck stops at the door.
He’s returned to his no-tie life, and the bags under his eyes are dark. He focuses his attention on Shelly.
“I just sent you an email with ad copy for the Whistler campaign,” he says. “There are a few tweaks since the earlier draft, and marketing needs it by lunch. Could you take a look at it as soon as you can?”
Shelly’s brows shoot to the ceiling. “Um, sure, Chuck. I’ll look at it as soon as I get back to my desk.”
“Thanks.”
He glances at me warily before giving me a curt nod and disappearing out of sight.
Shelly checks the hallway before coming all the way into my office and shutting the door. “What the hell was that?”
I grin mischievously.
“I mean, Chuck was almost nice,” she says, baffled. “And he managed an interaction without saying something shitty to you? What the hell? Did he run over someone on the way to work this morning or what?”
My hand flies to my mouth, covering my laughter. “That’s not funny.”
She throws her hands in the air. “Explain it to me then. Because that’s not Chuck. That was almost a regular person.”