Total pages in book: 86
Estimated words: 83814 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 419(@200wpm)___ 335(@250wpm)___ 279(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 83814 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 419(@200wpm)___ 335(@250wpm)___ 279(@300wpm)
“You really won’t order him into it?” I press, feeling a little wave of panic rush over me. Some part of me had hoped Valentin would at least ask Lev to follow this plan, but now I can see it’s going to be completely up to us.
“Would you want me to?” he asks, tilting his head to study me. “After you ran out on two arranged weddings, would you really force your brother into it?”
I look down at my lap as a wave of shame rushes over me. “No, I wouldn’t.”
“Good. Convince him. Give him a choice the way you weren’t given one. If you want to be better, than do better.” Valentin nods once at Alex then leaves the room.
I stare at the floor for a few moments, flushed and embarrassed.
“Are you okay?” Alex asks softly. He leans in close and kisses my cheek.
I’m surprised by the affection. “I don’t know why I wanted him to do that. Valentin’s right, I’d hate myself if I somehow forced Lev to do something I wouldn’t do myself.”
“It’s okay. That’s not what happened.”
“I know, I just—“
“We’re going to be okay.” He says it firmly, and I’m surprised by the fire in his voice. “No matter what, you and me and our baby, we’re going to be okay.”
I look at him. Alex’s eyes are filled with a devotion I’ve never seen in another person’s face before. He’s looking at me like I’m a treasure, like he’d do anything to keep me safe. I lean into him and gather myself. The hole in my chest feels like it’s full for the first time in a very long time.
“Let’s get out of here before Valentin changes his mind and decides to kill you after all,” I say and Alex only laughs at that.
Chapter 34
Alexander
I’m feeling good after the meeting with Valentin. Instead of going straight home, I take Natalya to Fed Jeweler.
“God, what a mess,” she says as she gingerly steps through the wreckage. The crew is on lunch and it’s quiet for a little while.
The place has been mostly cleared out. Black soot stains the ceiling, walls, and floor, but the workers are in the process of tearing out all the obviously damaged parts. They’ll have to do structural renovations first to make sure the whole roof doesn’t fall in, but once that’s done they’ll start putting Fed back together.
“When was the last time you were here?”
“A while ago. Before I left for Paris.” She pauses where the cash registers used to be. “When I was a little girl, Dad would let me run around the back and put on the jewelry. I’d pretend I was a princess. He loved it.”
“You probably wore millions in diamonds.”
“Oh, absolutely. Imagine a seven-year-old in a priceless necklace. Daddy thought it was hilarious.” She drifts through the room, smiling a little to herself. “He wasn’t the best father, but he had his moments.”
“We’ll have better moments.” I don’t know why I say it, but the feeling rushes over me. “My parents were addicts pieces of shit. They practically dumped me in the streets and left me to fend for myself. I’m not going to do that to my kid.”
She looks at me and puts a hand over her belly. “I know you won’t. That’s the whole point of this, right?”
“I mean it though.” I lean up against a support pillar. It’s not too ashy and looks like it’s in decent shape. “Have you thought about a name yet?”
“Something Russian, maybe.”
“For a girl, I like Sofia, maybe Elena or Tatiana.”
“Do those mean anything to you?”
I shake my head. “I want a clean break. No names from the past.”
“I can get into that.” She comes over and puts her hands on my chest. I look down at her and I know I’m doing the right thing. Even if it isn’t perfect—even if it’s wrong in so many other ways—it’s still right. It’s still what I need. “What about Vera?”
“I don’t hate Vera.”
“We need to start working on the nursery.” She leans into me, face against my chest. I wrap my arms around her warm little body. “Crib, diapers, all that good stuff.”
“Baby books,” I grunt at her.
“You’re seriously going to read them?”
“I already ordered three.”
“Bullshit.”
“I can show you my Amazon account if you want.”
She laughs and shakes her head. “No, that’s okay. I believe you.” She pulls away and starts wandering again. I watch her, unable to look away. I track her like a missile. “Can I be honest with you?”
“Please do.”
“I’m a little scared.”
“For childbirth? You’ll be okay. It’s going to be hard, but you can do hard things.”
She tilts her head side to side. “For that, but also all the stuff that comes after. You heard Valentin earlier. IT’s not easy.”
“I’ll be there. And that’s not an empty promise. Diaper changes, late night feedings, everything. You won’t be alone.”