Total pages in book: 93
Estimated words: 91914 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 460(@200wpm)___ 368(@250wpm)___ 306(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 91914 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 460(@200wpm)___ 368(@250wpm)___ 306(@300wpm)
I always thought Miller understood that, and what we had wasn’t your average friendship, but clearly he’s outgrown it. Or maybe we weren’t as close as I thought we were.
Outside the locker room, I hate the way my face brightens when I see him there waiting for me.
“What took you so long? Did you have to do your hair to make yourself pretty or what?” Miller reaches over and messes up my hair.
“Fuck off.” I swat at his hand. “We doing this?”
“Uh, yeah. Is it all right I invited Jackson too? I figure if you’re going to ream me for that tackle today, the new kid can see how much of a hard-ass you can be when we fuck up.”
I can’t talk about everything in front of Jackson, and Miller either knows this or thinks I only want to yell at him for the shitty practice.
Looking Jackson in the eye after the other day is gonna be fun.
It’s not strained between us, but it’s not exactly comfortable. I get the feeling he thinks it’s because he was with a guy, no matter how much I want to tell him it’s not. But if I do that, I have to explain I now feel weird around him because he and his boyfriend made something in my brain short-circuit and I haven’t been able to think about much else since it happened. Other than football. And Miller. But all of it seems to tie together in my head, and I don’t know why.
“We ready?” Jackson asks behind me, and I startle.
“Uh … yeah. Let’s go. Wait, where are we going? What’s good in here?”
“I know somewhere that won’t give us food poisoning,” Miller says.
“Sold,” Jackson says with a laugh.
Chapter Four
MILLER
“Hooters?” Talon asks. “You brought us to Hooters?”
“What’s wrong with that?” Truth is, it’s the most manly, most I’m totally into only chicks and not you place I could think of.
“Jackson’s gay, for one,” Talon says.
“They have awesome onion rings here. I’m good,” Jackson says. “And I’m starving.”
I brought Jackson as a buffer, because Talon should only stick to football talk if someone else is here. He wants to talk to me about what happened a few weeks ago and how blocking him at every chance is a dick thing to do, but the way I see it, there’s nothing to discuss. It’s not going to happen again, and he’s straight. Talking about it will only remind me of how much I fucked up by repeating old mistakes.
As we enter the restaurant and are assaulted by the scent of fried food and toxic masculinity, the hostess greets us with terms of endearment like “sweetie” and “cutie” and “hot stuff.”
When we’re seated at a table and finish ordering drinks from the waitress, a weird vibe settles between all of us. Talon refuses to look at Jackson, I refuse to look at Talon, and Jackson looks at the menu as if this is normal. Or maybe he can tell something’s up and wants to bury his head.
“So, uh, let’s hear it,” I say. “Rip me a new one for being distracted today.”
Talon looks between me and Jackson and then looks at the table as he casually says, “Don’t do it again.”
That’s all I get?
“That’s it?” Jackson asks. “I was expecting some drill-sergeant type shit.” He shakes his head. “I’m so disappointed in you, Talon.”
The waitress appears with our drinks, and as she puts Jackson’s down in front of him, she practically pushes her boobs into his face, which makes Talon and I snicker.
“As disappointing as that experience was?” Talon asks when she moves away.
Jackson takes a sip of Coke. “Eh. They’re just boobs.”
And that’s how I know I’m definitely bi and not gay. “Just boobs?”
“Do you know how productive I would be if I had that reaction to boobs?” Talon says. I almost laugh until he turns to me. “Is that why you were distracted today on the field?” His eyes narrow. “Like boobs in general or a certain pair? Are you seeing someone and didn’t tell me? Because that’s not cool after—” He slams his mouth shut and looks at Jackson again whose eyes are ping-ponging between Talon and me.
“Hey, look at that, my phone’s vibrating.” Jackson grabs out his phone, which is so not ringing, but that doesn’t stop him from pretending it is. “It’s Noah. I better take this outside.” He rushes out faster than a wide receiver on a breakaway.
“I’m not seeing anyone,” I say.
“Then what’s going on?”
“What do you mean?” I know exactly what he means, but I’m not gonna spell it out for him in the middle of a restaurant. Hooters, at that.
“Why are you avoiding me?”
What if you never see me as anything more than a guy you share girls with? Or worse yet, what if you see right through me and want nothing to do with me anymore?