Total pages in book: 74
Estimated words: 71651 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 358(@200wpm)___ 287(@250wpm)___ 239(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 71651 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 358(@200wpm)___ 287(@250wpm)___ 239(@300wpm)
“You want to come see the horses?” Finn asked. “Hot damn. You really are turning over a new leaf on Tennessee, aren’t you?”
“Honestly, I would have liked seeing the horses anytime,” I said, looking up at him from under my lashes. “I’m going to admit something to you.”
“Juicy secret?”
“Well, you know I always thought Mason wanted to fuck you,” I told him. “And… in retrospect, I think I might have been a little…”
Finn’s face brightened into a smile. “Holy shit, Ori, were you jealous?”
“Maybe.”
“Wow.”
“I wouldn’t have known it at the time, but maybe I was jealous. Mason just belongs in Tennessee, like you do. He’s a country boy, even if he’s not always rocking quite as many cowboy-style clothes as you.”
“So you didn’t want to come around the ranch?”
I pulled in a slow breath. “It’s just that I felt like I didn’t fit in anywhere around here. You and Mason, getting along so well even if he didn’t want to fuck you. You being here for my parents and for Olivia’s birth. Not to mention that everyone around town has always thought you’re the golden boy, whether it was in football or in the damn diner.”
“I didn’t know you felt it that strongly.”
I shook my head. “I numbed myself to it, while I was away,” I said. “But goddamn, Finn, I just wished I could snap my fingers and be more like you. I always kind of did.”
He shook his head. “No way. You were always more confident than me. Confident in how different you were.”
“Have you ever heard the phrase fake it ‘til you make it? Yeah. That was me.”
Finn swallowed. “Well, then I wish I could have been there for you, too,” he said softly. “I wish we both hadn’t been so goddamned stubborn.”
I puffed out a laugh. “Tell me about it.”
I was lost in thought for a minute, finishing off the rest of my French toast.
“All right,” Finn said. “Going forward, I’m just going to tell you how I feel, no matter what. Starting now. Ori, I think you’re really fucking hot when you lick maple syrup off your finger.”
I hummed, smiling at him. “You like when I lick things off of your finger, too.”
“God, I still can’t believe I made you do that, right after you got back to town.”
I lifted an eyebrow. “You didn’t just make me do it, trust me. I wanted to.”
“In the spirit of honesty, that’s hotter than fucking hell.”
After cleaning up, I got dressed and came back out.
“Well,” I said. “In the same spirit of honesty, I’ll tell you that I was secretly going to try to visit that art museum in Sable Valley today. I was afraid to bring it up because I’m telling you Finn, I don’t feel like I’m settling if I stay in Tennessee anymore.”
He looked surprised. “Are you sure about that? Because I heard you spout off about how shitty this place is for so long.”
“I know. And I feel awful about that,” I said. “I do still like the city, but… I was looking for it to fix my life, and that’s not something it’s ever going to do. Nothing in my life is going to be good if I stay closed off like that.”
Finn nodded, reading my face, clearly trying to figure out if he believed me.
“I want to try,” I told him softly.
It was all I wanted with everything, here.
I wanted to try with Finn.
To try with Tennessee, now.
To try to live in a way that felt right, not just in the way I’d been so dead set on when I was a powerless teenager.
“All right,” Finn finally said. “Full honesty: I support you trying. And even if you decide you hate me and hate Tennessee all over again, it’ll be worth it.”
“I could never fucking hate you,” I said, closing the gap between us and squeezing him as tight as I could. “Not possible. And as far as Tennessee goes, I’m going to give it my all, for once. Not with one foot out the door.”
When I pulled back to kiss Finn, I was shocked when I saw a stray tear falling down his cheek.
“I’m fine,” Finn said, wiping it away and taking a shaky breath in. “I just never thought I’d hear you say that.”
“I love you.”
“I love you, too,” he told me.
I swallowed. “So. Want to come check out this art museum with me?”
18
FINN
Old flames can’t hold a candle to you.
At first the small museum seemed like something Ori would have hated. The front rooms were old and so country western themed that I half expected him to high tail it out of there the moment we walked in.
There were many paintings and photographs of horses. Cowboys. Tennessee mountains and even hay bales.
But then the tour went on toward the new, renovated portion of the museum, where Ori had said a rich alum had donated to make the place something special.