Total pages in book: 87
Estimated words: 82034 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 410(@200wpm)___ 328(@250wpm)___ 273(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 82034 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 410(@200wpm)___ 328(@250wpm)___ 273(@300wpm)
“You know—”
“I thought I knew what it all meant,” I cut him off as I settle further back into my chair. “I thought it meant you put the person you love above all else. That you would do anything for that person. Sacrifice anything for love. But if a father can’t even do that for his own son, how could I ever believe a woman would do that for me?”
“Because it’s Avril, you asshole,” Andrew throws back at me through gritted teeth. “You’ve known her longer than your dad. How can you not fucking know this? How can you not believe in her?”
“Because I just watched her fall to pieces over another man. After she told me she loved me. Do you realize the level of trust I had to put in her just to make it as far as I did, and then in the blink of an eye, she’s mourning another man?”
Andrew sighs wearily and scrubs his hands over his face. “Look, Dane… I get that was hard to take, but cut her some slack. She had been in love with him. He died unexpectedly. And he died because she signed the papers to pull the plug. You have to let her have some feelings about it.”
Now I sigh, turning my head and looking out the window. I can’t stand to look at the condemnation on Andrew’s face. “Every insecurity I’ve ever had about love and commitment has surfaced. Every ugly thing I ever thought about every stupid fool who chose to believe in love came roaring at me like an avalanche. I might be wrong. Hell, I probably am, but if I can’t handle something like this with Avril, how can I fucking handle anything? It’s just too much. I’m not equipped to—”
A knock on the door stops me in midsentence, and my throat constricts when I see Avril walking through.
She looks like hell. Her hair is caught up in a messy knot, and she’s wearing jeans and a ratty long-sleeve Berkley t-shirt. Her skin is pale and there are dark circles under her eyes. My stomach clenches as I consider that much of her appearance is because she’s grieving for Jamie. I held her in my arms while she sobbed out her misery and pain for another man. And every tear that fell made me convinced that her declaration of love for me was hollow.
“Were you two just talking about me?” she asks as she looks from me to Andrew. I know my face is blank because that’s about how I feel on the inside, but Andrew’s looks guilty as shit.
Neither one of us answer her.
She takes a few steps into my office. “I repeat, were you talking about me?”
Andrew gives a little cough and takes a step toward her. “Yes. We are worried about you.”
Avril gives a cynical laugh. “I believe you are worried about me, Andrew,” she says in a voice that quavers with anger. She turns her head to look at me. “But you, Dane… if you were really worried, you would have done more. You would have come to see me, or called me. There are a million fucking ways you could have let me know you cared but instead, you’re hiding away and letting Andrew do what you should be doing.”
“I sent you a text,” I say. But the minute the words are out, I know how lame they are.
“Oh, yes,” Avril says with sarcasm practically dripping from her mouth. “Such a thoughtful text. Have some meetings this morning; Drew has you covered. Will come by later. That hit me right in the feels, Dane.”
Guilt clogs my throat, but my hackles stay firmly raised because now both of my best friends are attacking me. Granted, it’s well deserved, but I’m just not in the fucking mood to deal with all this.
We engage in a staring war, Avril’s eyes pinned on me with a mixture of anger and perpetual hope, and it kills me. I keep mine impassively neutral, which I can tell is making her more pissed off.
Finally, she turns to look at Andrew. “Do you mind giving us a few minutes alone?”
Andrew smiles at her and nods. He walks right up to her and loops an arm around her neck, pulling her in close so he can whisper something in her ear. Whatever he’s saying is resonating because she nods her head in agreement.
My chest burns when he hugs her hard, and then kisses her temple. His lips linger there for far too long in my opinion, but I keep my mouth shut.
Andrew doesn’t look back at me once as he heads out the door, and I know he’s beyond disappointed in me.
Oh, well… he’ll get the fuck over it or he won’t.
My gaze comes back to Avril, who calmly walks over to one of the chairs opposite my desk. She perches on the edge of the seat, back ramrod straight and hands clasped loosely in her lap.