Total pages in book: 111
Estimated words: 105846 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 529(@200wpm)___ 423(@250wpm)___ 353(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 105846 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 529(@200wpm)___ 423(@250wpm)___ 353(@300wpm)
Baaaaaa.
Eventually, I decide to phone a friend. My friend, besides these sheep, being my sister. It takes four rings twice over on two different calls for her to answer, but when she does, I don’t bother with pleasantries.
“I have a problem.”
“Okay?”
“I decided to go for a run this morning before work, and now I have about a hundred sheep following me.”
I expect shock. Maybe horror. But Josie doesn’t give me either. She’s all business, so much so, it makes me wonder if she’s in the sheep business.
“Are they marked?”
“What do you mean marked?”
“Farmers around here mark their sheep and cattle with paint. Usually, a little strip down their back or on one side.”
“Um…” I step closer to my new sheep pals and note a bright-orange strip of paint on their left sides. “Yes. Orange paint.”
“Tad Hanson’s sheep have latched on to you because he’s apparently incapable of keeping them in his pasture.”
“Latched on to me? What does that mean?”
“That means they’re lost like always, and you’re their temporary mother until you get them home.”
“Get them home?” I shout, and the sheep beside me lets out a bleating noise. “Josie! I’m supposed to be at work in, like, forty minutes!”
“Well, unless Bennett is okay with you bringing along sheep for the day, I’d say you better get your little ass moving toward Tad’s farm.”
“Like I even know where Tad’s farm is! I’ve spoken to Tad once in my life, and that’s only because you refused to come to the bar with me after dinner.” And for as chatty as he was on Friday night, he didn’t get around to telling me where he lived.
“Norah, you know I don’t go there, so just get over it.”
“Get over it?!” I protest on a shout. “I’m in it! I spend one night talking to Tad, and now his sheep are stage five clingers!”
“Where are you?”
“On the Happy Trail.”
“You’re not too far from Tad’s. And lucky for you, Bennett’s place and Tad’s farm are right next door to each other.”
I sigh. “That doesn’t feel lucky. I was planning on taking a shower and getting ready for work like a normal human being. Not putting in two hours of herding sheep before starting my day.”
Josie just laughs and gives me directions to Tad Hanson’s farm from where I’m at on the Happy Trail.
And as I try to run these sheep home, I realize just how right Josie is about Bennett and Tad being next door to each other. They’re so close, in fact, I’m cutting through my new boss’s property to get to Tad’s. I recognize the front of his large house and can just barely make out the small building behind it that he utilizes as his studio.
Me and a hundred damn sheep traipsing through his freaking yard.
Could this be any more outrageous? I think not.
Please don’t let him see this. Please don’t let him see this. I repeat those words to myself fifty times as I sprint across the grass, but they do the exact opposite.
Right on cue, as if he could hear my internal thoughts, Bennett steps out onto his front porch and narrows his eyes toward me and my flock of sheep as we haul ass across his yard.
I try not to make eye contact, but let’s be real, it’s impossible. How can you not make eye contact in a situation as ridiculous as this?
I am a train wreck in progress, and Bennett Bishop can’t look away.
26
Norah
Of all the ways to start today off, being the leader of a flock of sheep in the middle of Bennett’s yard wasn’t one of the options I mulled over. A clear-the-air chat, a just-act-like-nothing-happened avoidance, those were more on par with what I’d pictured.
But this? Yeah. Epitome of awkward. And now that I’ve been spotted, keeping this very embarrassing moment a secret is no longer an option.
Bennett crosses his arms over his chest and leans into the post at the front of his porch. His eyes are locked on me and my flock, and bells and baaas sound at my back as I approach him. He’s silent, as expected, but his face says more than enough for a full-blown rebuttal to trigger in my head and shoot off my mouth in a ramble.
“So, weird story, but I started this morning on a run slash walk, thinking I could get back on track in the area of physical fitness, and now I’m kind of, like, the head of this herd of sheep. Josie says they’re Tad’s because they have orange paint on them, so I’ve been trying to get them to go home. I heard he lives next to you, so, well, here I am with a herd of sheep in your yard.”
When he doesn’t say anything, I take a deep breath and continue.
“I know things are a little weird between us because of Friday, and I know this is inconvenient and I’m undoubtedly going to be late for work now, but I’ve tried cajoling them, complimenting them, and insulting them for going on an hour now, and none of it has seemed to help get rid of them.”