Total pages in book: 187
Estimated words: 184867 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 924(@200wpm)___ 739(@250wpm)___ 616(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 184867 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 924(@200wpm)___ 739(@250wpm)___ 616(@300wpm)
He hugs me just as tightly, refusing to let me go when I try, and it moves me.
“I love you,” he says. “I fucking love you, Caleb. I mean it. With every inch of my soul.”
And it breaks me.
Tears roll down my cheeks as I bury my face in his shoulders and let out all of the grief and rage I’d been holding on to until nothing but a vapid shell was left of me, just like my mother.
BLAINE
The funeral is the day after Caleb’s mother died. He and his father collectively agreed to have it done quickly so she wouldn’t have to stay another day on this earth. Something about her soul having already left this place.
If it were up to me, I’d want people to burn my corpse on a pyre and have a dance with some drinks. Make it a big-ass party. All the doom and gloom really isn’t for me.
I languish in this black suit.
But today isn’t about me, so I won’t pity myself.
After all, it’s Caleb and his father who are experiencing the biggest hurt.
They throw flowers on top of the casket as it’s hoisted down into the hole they dug. Everyone around us is weeping and holding hands.
Crystal’s mom grabs Caleb’s dad’s hand, but he jerks away and turns to his son, and she steps away, out of sight.
I sigh and grab Crystal’s hand instead, squeezing it so she’ll know I’m here while Ares holds the other. If Caleb needs us, we’re here for him, but until then, we’ll stand on the sidelines, waiting.
Crystal
Ares, Blaine, and I sit at a table, eating badly made sandwiches that taste like cardboard. I’m not that hungry, but eating food helps digest grief, they say.
I place my sandwich down and sigh.
“C’mon, eat,” my mom says as she sits down and places a plate of veggies in front of me. “If you won’t have the sandwiches, at least eat some cucumbers or something.”
She hands some sticks to me, and I hesitantly take a bite.
“What about you?” I ask.
She reluctantly takes a bite out of her own cardboard sandwich. “Yummy.”
“Don’t lie.” I snort.
“Shhh,” she hisses. “No need to offend the hosts.”
“Funeral food never tastes good,” Blaine says while Ares rolls his eyes.
“So you two are her friends?”
Blaine nearly chokes on his sandwich, and he swallows down a whole chunk. “Friends?”
I throw him a look.
“Oh … wait…”
“What?” my mother mutters.
“Nothing,” I swiftly say. “Yes, they’re my … friends.”
Ares glares at me, his arms folded.
“They seem nice,” she says, swallowing a big bite.
“Very,” Blaine muses.
I shove Ares with my elbow, whispering, “Say something.”
“I don’t do small talk,” Ares grumbles.
He scoots his chair back and walks off, leaving me in a really awkward position.
Goddammit.
“Well, he sure seems like a fun one,” Mom says.
“Definitely the fun one,” Blaine says, chuckling to his own joke.
In the corner of the room, Caleb and his father are accepting hugs and handshakes for their loss, but the more hands he shakes the more he seems to be disassociating.
“He’s not doing too well, is he?” I mutter.
Blaine shakes his head.
I get up and walk up to him from behind, squeezing his hand to signal that I’m there.
“How are you holding up?” I whisper.
He briefly pulls away from the crowd of people to hug me tightly. “Barely surviving.” He snorts. “But I’ll make it.”
“If you need anything, let me know, okay?”
He leans away to look at me. “For a girl who used to hate my guts, you sure are nice to me,” he says, smirking at me.
His father throws a single glance at my mother before turning the other direction.
“Has my mother talked with your dad at all?” I ask.
Caleb shakes his head. “I don’t know what happened between those two, but they’ve been cold to each other.”
His father clears his throat. “I can hear you.”
I blush. “Sorry.”
“It’s fine,” he says and he turns to his son. “I’ve actually been meaning to tell you this before, but I didn’t know how. And now that your mother is gone, it feels like such a bad time, but …”
“What is it, Dad?” Caleb asks.
“Abigail and I actually broke up.”
I’m too stunned to even say a word.
Caleb frowns. “Wait, for real?”
His dad nods. “A few days ago. I realized I may have jumped into an engagement too quickly to pretend everything was fine. I just wanted to heal this broken heart.” He throws in a weak smile. “And now that your mother is gone, it truly doesn’t feel right to go back to that. I want to take the proper time to grieve.”
“But you loved her, right?” Caleb asks.
“I did … but we weren’t as compatible as I thought we were,” he says, rubbing his lips together. “I didn’t want to string her along.” He looks at me. “I’m sorry, was I the first one to tell you this? I apologize, I assumed she’d already spoken to you about it.”