Total pages in book: 122
Estimated words: 120475 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 602(@200wpm)___ 482(@250wpm)___ 402(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 120475 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 602(@200wpm)___ 482(@250wpm)___ 402(@300wpm)
“Always,” he grins at me. Men are simple creatures.
Inside, the thrum of bass vibrates through my bones, the music sinking into my skin like a second heartbeat.
And then I spot everyone. For the first time all week, the weight in my chest eases. The whole gang’s here. Is it weird that we hang out just to hang in the lounge of a BDSM sex club? I’ve obviously never given a shit about weird in my whole life, so no.
I should kiss Anna for inviting me. If she weren’t already head-over-heels for my brother, I’d consider it. She’s hot and a little nuts, so we have that in common. She’s got DID—dissociative identity disorder. Anna’s cool and all, but I gotta say, her alter, Mads, is a really fun time.
I weave through the crowd toward our usual lounge area, past familiar faces and whispered greetings.
I slide into the seat beside Kira and immediately clock the situation with her bodyguard, Isaak. She’s been having stalker problems, and Isaak’s just started a security firm, so he took the case.
But the way his arm is draped possessively over the back of her chair? It’s giving more than just bodyguard vibes. His whole body is turned toward her like he’s got some primal need to keep everyone else the fuck away.
I arch a brow at him. He rolls his eyes.
Interesting.
“Moira!” Kira leans in and hugs me like she actually means it.
I squeeze her tight, trying to ignore how good the human contact feels.
I let her go before I do something weird like burrow into her shoulder like a cat in need of warmth. “How’s life, darling?” I wiggle my brows, flicking a glance at Isaac.
Kira blushes. Blushes. She’s only a year older than me, but she’s got that whole buttoned-up professor thing going on, which makes teasing her that much more fun.
“You gettin’ some, huh?” I rock my hips against the chair and make some truly obscene noises.
“Moira,” a voice cuts through the conversation. Sharp. Cold.
My whole body locks up before I even turn my head.
Domhnall, my brother.
I force myself to look at him. He’s got Anna curled in his lap, arms wrapped around her like she’s something precious.
There’s naked contempt in his eyes as he looks at me. Not annoyance. Not frustration. Contempt.
Anna glances between us, frowning. I can see it in her face; she hates this. She starts to say something, but Domhn just turns away.
Like I don’t exist.
He murmurs something in Anna’s ear, making her giggle and snuggle closer. He tucks a piece of hair behind her ear, the picture of a devoted fiancé.
I try not to stare.
Anna’s the best thing that’s ever happened to my brother. I know people think my relationship with Domhn is weird, that my exhibitionism and lack of shame must mean something, but I do have boundaries. He’s my brother. That’s it. That’s all.
I just…
I just wish someone would love me like that one day.
Because whatever that is—the easy way they fit together, the way they always seem to exist in their own little world—that’s not something I’ve ever had. Not something I ever thought I wanted.
But maybe that’s because I never thought it was possible for someone like me.
That chasm inside me cracks open a little wider, a yawning void that no amount of sex or fun or recklessness has ever been able to fill.
Because there’s nothing inside me.
Certainly, nothing worth adoring.
“So, what have you been up to?” Kira asks me.
I grin back at her, and I make sure it stretches ear to ear. Fuck all that maudlin shit for now. I’m in party-Moira mode. Light-hearted. Fun. I twirl the end of one of my pigtails. “Oh, you know, the usual—fucking around and getting fucked.”
She laughs, shaking her head. “I’ve always admired how... free you live.”
“Oh, honey, don’t.” I kick my heels up on the table and smirk. “I’ve just got you all snowed. I’m the great and powerful Oz.” I wiggle my fingers at her. “Pay no attention to the emotional disaster behind the curtain.”
Quinn peels herself away from the chair she was sitting in beside Domhn and Anna to join us. Finally. Something interesting. She’s my oldest friend and the only woman I know who isn’t side-eyeing me, wondering if I’m about to steal her man. Not that I ever would. But some girls get twitchy when their boyfriends so much as look at me, the dangerous, self-admitted sex addict.
“Taking a night off, gorgeous?” I ask, eyeing the way Quinn moves like a panther even when she’s off duty.
She perches on the edge of a leather chair like a queen on her throne, all perfect posture and coiled power. Meanwhile, I’m splayed out like a lazy cat in the sun. She shrugs. “It’s nice to chill here without my boot halfway up a sub’s ass, you know?”