Total pages in book: 33
Estimated words: 31720 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 159(@200wpm)___ 127(@250wpm)___ 106(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 31720 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 159(@200wpm)___ 127(@250wpm)___ 106(@300wpm)
“Then what do you do?”
“Nothing.” He grips the steering wheel harder.
“Nothing? You’re full of shit. There’s no way.”
“Tell me what you’ve been doing, and I’ll tell you,” he offers. Do I really want to know? I’m not sure I’ll be able to take hearing him tell me about him being with a woman.
“You first,” I say after a beat. I guess I’m a masochist.
“I wasn’t lying. I don’t do anything. Not since—” He flicks a glance my way.
“You don’t do anything?” I lick my lips. “You don’t touch yourself, Uncle Gilly?”
“God damn it, Carina!” he shouts. Okay. Maybe I took it a bit too far. “Now you. Spill.”
“You didn’t really answer mine, so I don’t have to tell you shit.”
“I told you.” He sighs.
I stare at him for a long moment, and it hits me. “You’re serious?” Gilly is always so calm and disciplined. At least that’s what I remember him as. Until now. He’s snapped. “You’re punishing yourself, aren’t you?” He’s mad that he wants me.
I guess I’m not the only masochist. I want to push for more, but I leave it for now. Gilly has to choose where he stands. He’s fighting his own inner battle. I can’t make him choose me. I wouldn’t want to.
“Your turn.”
“You can’t get mad.” I chew on my bottom lip. I’m already on very thin ice. I’m not sure telling him what I’ve gotten myself into right now is the best idea. I have no idea how he’s going to react. Especially when he hears it involves Falco.
“I couldn’t get madder.”
I don’t speak for a long moment. He pins me with a hard look in the rearview mirror. “Tell me.” I come undone at the gentleness of his tone. The words spill past my lips.
I give it all to him. Well, all that really applies to what’s happening now. Magic, Ocean, and I have done small things to test the waters here or there, such as stealing drones or whatnot, but I don’t go into those tiny details.
“And what did you think you were going to do tonight? Your little drone girl and computer whiz couldn’t protect you inside that club.”
“I was going to show him what it meant to play with a Palermo.”
Gilly shakes his head.
“He came into my home and tried to threaten me,” I hiss.
“You should have told me. I would have handled it.”
“Tell you? Why the hell would I do that?”
“Because I can protect you!” he shouts. It makes me jump. I’m not used to him exploding, but that doesn’t stop me from doing it right back.
“You don’t protect me, Gilly! You hurt me. Don’t you get that?” The words are out of my mouth before I can really think about what I’m saying.
“Carina, I–”
I meet his gaze in the rearview and press my palm to my chest over my heart. “This is what you hurt. Over and again. Don’t tell me you protect me when you always leave me broken.”
He keeps his gaze locked with mine, but I know it’s only a matter of time before he lets go. He always does.
17
GILLY
The anguish in her voice breaks me. She slumps back in her seat as I drive up to the garage attached to the pool house.
As soon as I put the car in park, she has the door open and is turning to walk away from me. “I can sneak in the same way I snuck out.” Her voice trembles, but she keeps her chin up.
“Stay.” I shouldn’t say it, but I do. I shouldn’t mean it, but I fucking do. I’ve only ever wanted Carina, and I can’t bear the thought of causing her harm.
She whirls. “Stay?” She cocks her head to the side as if she can’t quite hear me.
I reach my hand out to her, holding it open and silently willing her to take it. “Stay with me tonight.”
“So you can play with me some more and hide me away like your dirty little secret?” she challenges.
“No.” I can’t look away from her. I never could, not really. It’s a truth I’ve been fighting, one I thought I could somehow master. But I can’t. Carina isn’t a woman I can deny or ever truly let go, and what I feel for her is all-consuming. Admitting it to myself is easier than I’d imagined. It’s like letting go and falling but knowing that the fall will be worth it, even if the landing hurts.
She steps closer, her gaze on mine. “Then what?”
“I’m going to worship your body and take your virginity. No.” I shake my head. “Not just take it. I’m going to enjoy it and every bit of you, every last fucking crumb. Because I can’t keep doing this. I can’t keep shutting you out when all I want to do is give you all of me.” I take a deep breath. “If that’s what you want.” My hand is still there, waiting for her to bridge the gap between us.