Total pages in book: 75
Estimated words: 68691 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 343(@200wpm)___ 275(@250wpm)___ 229(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 68691 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 343(@200wpm)___ 275(@250wpm)___ 229(@300wpm)
“I guess what it is,” said Kristian with a wry glance at his brothers, “is that we have some kind of abandonment syndrome.”
I looked at them with a puzzled expression. Abandonment?
“Yes, abandonment,” said Kristian, his face sober. “I felt abandoned because my mother was never really in the picture. I mean Agatha,” he clarified quickly. “Agatha was never interested in me, as you’ve probably guessed,” he said. “I never saw her when I was growing up. I was raised by assorted nannies, our family butler, or whoever else happened to be around,” he shrugged. “Agatha was always getting her nails done, her hair done, or having lunch with friends. Who knows? It sounds crazy but I wouldn’t see my mother for two weeks at a time, even though we lived down the hall from one another.”
“Anyways, I buried my feelings of abandonment,” he said wryly. “I had a lot of other things to keep me busy, judo, lacrosse, wrestling, and after a while, politics and economics, the things a young prince was expected to take up. I didn’t realize how hurt I was by Agatha’s lack of interest until recent events, when I saw how Violet jumped through hoops for the twins, acting crazy even, doing anything to protect Kato and Karl.
“So when shit hit the fan, I had an internal meltdown. I know I should have stuck around,” he said slowly, “made sure that everything got back on track before jetting off with Halliburton. But I didn’t. I guess I felt so hurt by the revelations that I turned inwards, seeking peace and solace within myself, putting myself in radically different environs so that I could get away from it for a while, deal with it in my own good time.”
I shook my head confused.
“But Kristian,” I said slowly. “What happened that made you break down? I mean if Agatha’s never really been a part of your life, why would you feel abandoned all of a sudden?”
“That’s the thing,” he said slowly. “It’s not that the abandonment came on suddenly. It’s been a constant thing, a drip drip in my life that’s existed since I was a child. And there was no cathartic moment per se,” he added wryly. “I guess it was seeing how much Violet loved Kato and Karl … and then finding out she was my mother too.”
“Kristian, we were all played by the Rothchilds, don’t blame Agatha,” rumbled Kato. “She was a pawn, just like everyone else.”
“Yeah, but see, I thought I was one of them,” said Kristian slowly. “I thought that my grandfather, my uncles, my aunts all across the Continent were on my team. And it turns out I was just an interloper to them, they never loved me … and neither did my so-called mother.”
I was still for a moment. Okay, yes, there had been a lot of revelations about his heritage. Maybe finding out that Agatha wasn’t his biological mom explained her disinterested behavior, but how was anything going to change from here on out?
“So what’s different?” I said slowly. “Are you going to try and form a relationship with Agatha? Is that what you’re saying?”
“Oh hell no,” he said with a laugh. “That’s over and done with, that woman can kiss my ass. Did you notice?” he said with a pause, “that she’s barely been a part of all this? That we haven’t heard a peep from Agatha, she’s had nothing to say, avoiding us all, doing her own thing, despite the fact that she’s a major player in this drama? That’s how she is,” he nodded. “My entire life, that’s how she’s been – uncaring, non-existent, a big zero.”
I nodded. It made no sense to build bridges with a woman who had never been, and probably still wasn’t interested in you.
“So what does this mean?” I asked slowly. “What does this mean for me and the babies?” I asked, gesturing to my stomach. “Are you over your so-called abandonment issues? If you’re not seeking closure with Agatha, then what are you looking for?”
Kristian paused for a moment.
“I’ll be honest with you and say that I’m not totally sure,” he said slowly, looking at me somberly. “Because I still have a hole in my life, a giant-sized feeling of loss,” he admitted. “I think the only thing I can do is work on it. Work on myself, find fulfillment and happiness through you, the babies, our quad,” he said. “I know now that you’re everything to me, and believe me when I say I’ll never leave you again.”
And here Karl coughed a bit.
“I don’t want to butt in, but have you thought about building a relationship with Violet?” he suggested. “She’s come off as unsteady, flighty, with a vindictive streak against Georg, but at the same time, she was a good mother to us. Over-protective, yes. Afraid of setting us free in the world, yes. But she loved us, and Kato and I,” he said, nodding at his brother, “we’ve never doubted her love for us, that we were number one in her book always.”