Total pages in book: 98
Estimated words: 96712 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 484(@200wpm)___ 387(@250wpm)___ 322(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 96712 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 484(@200wpm)___ 387(@250wpm)___ 322(@300wpm)
I land on my back with a thud, and then he’s right there, blanketing my body with his.
“I need you.” His lips trail my cheek, my jaw, down my neck.
“Have me,” I rasp.
He backs off for a split second to stare up at me. “There’s no time to fuck. I need fast, and I need it right now.”
Maybe I’m telepathic, because I swear I hear the “before I change my mind” on the end of that sentence.
There’s no finesse in the way we lose our clothes or in the way he flips ’round so we’re on our sides and he can wrap his lips around my cock, while his is right there for me to take.
Unlike him, I’m not in the mood for fast and dirty, even though my hips have other ideas. They buck and squirm as Matt takes me to the back of his mouth, and his hand squeezes my ass cheek to keep me from being able to retreat. Not that I could right now anyway.
I use my hand to jack him, while my tongue teases his balls. There’s a reason I usually don’t like this position. I like to focus on giving everything to my partner, but I can’t when he’s determined to get me off as fast as possible. I can’t concentrate with the familiar tightening of my balls and warmth rushing through me, continuously building and building to the point I can’t even think, let alone remember how to suck a dick.
Matt moans around my cock, and it sounds like he’s trying to say Noah. It brings me back from the ledge and snaps me out of my selfish focus. Before I get to work, I cover my finger in saliva and reach around to Matt’s ass.
He practically whimpers when I take him into my mouth and breach his hole at the same time.
The whole thing becomes sloppy on both sides. We’re unable to focus but can’t stop. We mindlessly fuck each other’s mouths and lose ourselves until I don’t even know which one of us comes first.
The orgasm hits hard but lasts so long I lose the ability to swallow. The rest of Matt’s release lands on my neck and chest, but Matt takes all of me until I forcibly have to remove my cock from his mouth.
Catching my breath takes longer than usual, and by the time I snap back to reality, I’m cold and covered in Matt’s cum, sweat, and saliva. Definitely something worth waking up at four a.m. for. But something’s wrong. Matt’s no longer touching me, and when I sit up, he has his arm over his eyes, refusing to look at me.
“Matt …” I reach for his towel beside me and wipe myself down before I climb on top of him.
He doesn’t remove his arm from his eyes. “I can’t.”
“Can’t what?”
“I … I can’t do this anymore,” he whispers. He grabs me around my waist and moves me off him and then sits up so we’re side by side. “I’m sorry. You told me not to fall for you, and I promised I wouldn’t, but if we keep going like this, there’s no way I’m going to be able to walk away from you.”
My throat constricts.
“I don’t want to put you in the same position you were in with Aron, so I’m bowing out now. I’m already too far gone, and I’m sorry I broke my promise. Football is my life, but when I’m with you, it’s insignificant. It’s a silly game I get a lot of money to play. If you’d let me, I’d give it all up, but I know it’s not what you want.” He pauses and waits for a reaction I can’t bring myself to give. “Please let me off the hook. Let me go now before it gets worse.”
Let him go before you can hurt him more.
“I’m sorry” is all I manage to say.
“You don’t need to be sorry. You did nothing wrong here. I did.”
We both did. This is so much more than I’ve ever had—than I’ve ever wanted.
“I’m gonna head back to PA today, clean up some loose ends, and then go to Chicago early before I need to report to Milwaukee. I found a place yesterday, and it’s available now.”
“Yesterday,” I murmur. “You decided yesterday you were leaving.” I grit my teeth, my jaw hardening. “So that’s what this was? A goodbye?”
“I didn’t … I shouldn’t have … I’m sorry. We shouldn’t have done that.”
When he gets off the floor and stands, he holds out his hand to help me up. I move in a stupor and can’t seem to be able to do anything for myself. Matt throws me my sweats, while he slips on his gym shorts, but I remain frozen, staring at a room I barely use as it is. Now it’ll always remind me of the time the guy I loved begged me not to hurt him. Again, I find myself on the edge of asking him to stay—to choose me. All I have to do is say the words, and he’ll do it.