Total pages in book: 132
Estimated words: 125465 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 627(@200wpm)___ 502(@250wpm)___ 418(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 125465 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 627(@200wpm)___ 502(@250wpm)___ 418(@300wpm)
I swallow around the knot of emotion clogging my throat. I end the call without saying goodbye and rush to my bed, crashing against the sheets and burying my face into the pillow a moment before a scream of pain rips from my throat.
Physically, I’m fine, but emotionally, I’m ripped to pieces.
Memories play on repeat in my mind, and the pain grows worse. Each memory is a slash to my already broken heart.
He was my first kiss, the first man to touch and explore my body. The first man I ever truly trusted outside of my brother and father. There was never a moment when I was with him that I felt unsafe, and now Quinton is telling me he’s done things to make every single memory a lie.
He made me feel safe so many times; Ren couldn’t do the things my brother said he did. In my mind, they have the wrong guy. There is no way the person they were talking about is the same person who held me together during my worst moments.
I run as fast as my legs will carry me. I don’t know where I’m going. All I know is that I can’t stay in the house for another moment. Not when the loss of Adela hangs in the air like a thick black curtain forcing out every ray of light. It’s suffocating.
Rushing through the garden, I nearly trip over my feet, my vision blurry with tears. She is gone. My big sister is gone, and there is nothing any of us can do to bring her back.
I barely make it through the first turn of the garden maze before sagging against the marble bench, a ragged sob ripping from my throat. I will never be able to look at life the same, not with Adela missing from it.
As I lie on the bench, my cheek against the cold stone, all I can think about is staying here forever. I can’t actually do that, though; my parents will come searching for me, eventually. I’ll be forced to return to the warmth of our home, but as long as I can, I will lie here, sobbing, willing someone to explain to me why it had to be her.
I’m not sure how long I stay here, but eventually, it starts to rain. The cold droplets don’t have any effect on me.
Raindrops make it easier to hide your tears.
Somewhere off in the distance, I hear my name being called. I don’t stir, move, or make a sound. All I do is lie here. I don’t want to be rescued. I want to be as close to Adela as I can get, and that means being outside and braving the elements.
“Scarlet.” A deep voice I recognize grows closer.
The voice makes my heart beat faster because I know right away who it belongs to. Ren appears around the corner a second later, his white shirt, wet with rain, sticking to his perfectly sculpted body. Instantly, he takes me into his arms, the warmth of his body radiating the heat back into me.
“Jesus, you’re cold. How long have you been out here?”
“I don’t know,” I whisper. “Not long enough.”
In his arms, I’m safe, protected, and secure. I’m everything my sister will never be again, and that thought sends me careening over the edge all over again.
I’m not embarrassed by Ren seeing me sob like a child. I don’t care what he thinks, not at the moment. Not even when I clutch his shirt and pull him closer, needing his warmth.
“Shh, I’m here, and I always will be,” Ren soothes while his huge hand rubs gentle circles against my back.
Ren is different. He always has been. He allows me to feel whatever it is I’m feeling without judgment. Without expecting me to be strong. He doesn’t ask me to hide it, doesn’t ask me to stop. He simply allows me to be me, free as a bird, and I can’t thank him enough for it.
“I miss her so much, and she hasn’t even been gone that long. How will I make it through the days going forward? How will I survive when a part of me feels like it died with her? My parents will expect us to pretend everything is okay, but it’s not, Ren. Nothing is okay.” The words spill out of me.
“You’ll make it through. I promise. I’ll be here for you every step of the way, and with every day that passes, the loss will get easier.” He pulls me up, and like a small child, I climb onto his lap, letting him cradle me while I sob uncontrollably into his chest. “In our world, death is just another event, a stepping stone, but I know as well as you do that your parents will never look at your sister’s death like it never happened. Unfortunately, weakness isn’t something we can afford to show. Right now, even as hard as it is, you have to stand strong.”