Total pages in book: 103
Estimated words: 100713 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 504(@200wpm)___ 403(@250wpm)___ 336(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 100713 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 504(@200wpm)___ 403(@250wpm)___ 336(@300wpm)
Her words were like knives to my heart, but I left them there.
“I’m going to go upstairs to bed now, because I think over the last couple years I’ve developed one good instinct—knowing when to cut my losses and leave.”
“Wait.” Quickly I moved toward the stairs, blocking them. “Don’t go.”
“Tell me the truth, right here and now,” she demanded, tears spilling over. “You’re not doing me any favors by pretending. Did I pin my hopes on the impossible? Did I mistake your feelings for something they’re not?”
With panic wrapped around my throat like a snake, I looked her right in the eye and lied. “Yes.”
She closed her eyes. “Then let me go.”
Feeling as if I had no choice, I stepped aside and let her run up the stairs and disappear into her bedroom, closing the door behind her.
Then I sank onto the steps and dropped my head into my hands, wondering how I’d fucked that up so spectacularly. So quickly. So painfully.
Why couldn’t I ever get it right with her?
A second later, I heard my dad’s bedroom door open. “Beckett?” he called out.
I got to my feet and walked into the great room where he could see me. “I’m here.”
He stood in his pajamas, hair sticking out as usual. “I thought I heard Maddie’s voice.”
“She just went to bed.”
“Oh. Was she upset about something?”
Exhaling, I pinched the bridge of my nose. Of course he had to pick tonight to be sharp. “I don’t know, Dad.”
“Are you upset about something?”
“Yes,” I snapped.
“What?”
“It’s a long story.”
He held out his arms. “I’m not going anywhere.”
“It’s complicated.”
“I bet it’s not as complicated as you’re making it.”
I dropped my hand. “What do you do when you’ve managed to screw something up really badly and you’re not sure you’ll get a chance to turn things around or even how to do it?”
He nodded as if he understood. “Well, you can’t let your team down. You have to get back out there.”
Baseball. Of course.
“I don’t know, Dad. I feel like I’m at the plate and I’ve got two strikes already and no clue what to do with the fastball that’s coming at me.”
“You swing, dummy! You’ve already got two strikes on you, you swing!”
I glared at him. “Thanks.”
“You’re welcome.” He sniffed. “Now keep it down out here.”
He went into his bedroom and shut the door.
I turned off the lights downstairs, locked the doors, and went upstairs with slow, heavy steps. In the second floor hall, I looked at Maddie’s closed door. Then I went to it, lifted my hand to knock.
That’s when I heard her crying.
Dropping my arm, I leaned forward, silently pressing my forehead against the door.
Leave her be, said a voice inside me. You can’t give her what she wants, and you’ll only do more damage.
Feeling like I’d let down my team, I went into my own room and got into bed alone.
Eighteen
Maddie
When I looked at myself in the bathroom mirror the next morning, I winced.
Puffy, bloodshot eyes. Pale, blotchy face. Downturned mouth. Pink nose. Matted hair from tossing and turning all night.
Normally, I got dressed and went down to the kitchen right away to get the coffee going, but today I turned on the shower. Maybe it would put some life back in my face and some energy into my bones. Perhaps I could wash that man right out of my hair.
But it didn’t work.
Even when my hair was smooth, my complexion had some color, and my eyedrops had gotten most of the red out, I still looked sad and hopeless. Taking a deep breath, I went into Elliott’s room to wake him, only to find his bed was empty. Since it was nearly seven, I assumed he’d gone out to help Beckett with the chores on his own, probably without eating anything.
Downstairs, I found Mr. Weaver spooning up Cap’n Crunch at the kitchen table.
“There you are,” he said. “I was beginning to wonder if you’d left without saying goodbye.”
I managed a smile. “I’m still here. Sorry I’m down so late today.”
“That’s okay. I made some breakfast by myself.”
I noticed Beckett had made coffee and poured myself a cup. “Is Elliott outside already?”
“Yeah. He went out with Beckett.”
“Did he eat anything?” I glanced out the kitchen window but didn’t see anyone.
“I think Beckett made him some toast.”
I brought my cup of coffee to the table and sat down across from Mr. Weaver. Tried to be cheerful. “Looks like a beautiful day, doesn’t it? Perfect for a wedding.”
He tilted his head. “Are you getting married today?”
“No. Not me.” Smiling gently, I shook my head. “Cole and Cheyenne are getting married today.”
“Oh, that’s right.” He picked up his coffee cup. “For a second, I thought I missed the part where Beckett came to his senses.”
“You didn’t miss anything,” I said bitterly, a lump forming in my throat.