Total pages in book: 185
Estimated words: 191421 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 957(@200wpm)___ 766(@250wpm)___ 638(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 191421 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 957(@200wpm)___ 766(@250wpm)___ 638(@300wpm)
And when he…
When he puts his mouth on you, the mouth that he’s putting on the rim of that beer bottle he’s drinking from, you become cursed.
You make mistakes. You do stupid things.
And then you pay for them.
I know all that.
I know it all first-hand.
Because I’ve been that close to him. I have felt all those things.
His heat. His strength.
And his curse.
Because two years ago, on the night of my sixteenth birthday, I was foolish enough to kiss him.
My boyfriend’s best friend.
And I’m still paying for it.
CHAPTER EIGHT
I’m a slut.
That’s explanation number one.
Of why I kissed my boyfriend’s best friend when I was sixteen.
Why I kissed one boy when I was in love with another.
Explanation number two is that I’m stupid.
I’m a stupid slut.
For ruining the best thing that ever happened to me.
For hurting the guy I love.
Both things, I never thought I was or ever would be. Both things, I sometimes wonder why I was in the first place.
When I was dating Lucas, I never looked at another guy. He was it for me. He was the one. So I don’t know why I would do what I did.
I have no explanation for my stupid and slutty behavior.
Just like I have no explanation — still — for what I’d done before I turned into the slut of Bardstown.
Freaking out and running away.
I did that, didn’t I?
When Lucas had asked me to marry him.
I still don’t know why I felt the way I did.
Trapped and suffocated and strangled.
All I know is that I did and I wish I hadn’t.
I wish I could turn back time and undo all the damage. I wish I could go back and hear that knock on my bedroom door. The knock by my boyfriend who’d come back to talk about what had happened at the restaurant but instead found me cheating on him.
I can’t change any of that though.
All I can do is try to make some amends.
Something that I’ve wanted to do for two years now and haven’t been able to. Because Lucas wouldn’t let me; he’s cut off all contact with me. So a couple of weeks ago when I read in that chat group that he was coming back to town, I thought this was my chance.
They had his whole itinerary posted, all the parties he was going to go to, all the get-togethers that were being thrown in his honor. While I did pay attention to the itinerary — I’m here, aren’t I? — I was more concerned about his reason for coming back: his father is ill and they say that he might be dying.
His father is not a good person. That’s the very first thing.
He used to abuse Lucas when he was growing up, and I know that Lucas hates his dad. But I also know that despite everything, he’s a good son. Which means even though he’s had a difficult relationship with his father, this must be tough for him, his imminent passing.
Only that stupid freaking chat never mentioned anything about him.
Or maybe they did but beyond Lucas I didn’t pay attention to anything else.
To the one thing — the one person — who could potentially stop me.
My biggest mistake, all six feet and three inches of him.
My boyfriend’s — ex-boyfriend’s — best friend.
And get this: instead of standing at the far end of this very tacky bar, he’s right here.
He’s sitting in front of me.
Sitting.
It’s surreal, isn’t it?
How is this even happening?
Okay, you know what, let me just do the run-down of everything that has happened ever since I arrived here, that led to this very dream-like moment.
So first, I came with all my friends. And their boyfriends.
Actually, there are boyfriends and also brothers.
One of the girls, Calliope Thorne, has like four big brothers.
Yup, four. Of which three are here.
When Poe gathered all her friends to accompany me to The Horny Bard, Callie was the one who pointed out that we were going to need help getting inside a bar since we were all underage. So it might be a good idea to involve her brothers plus her boyfriend — oh wait, husband; she’s married to this gorgeous-looking guy who somehow always manages to stay within her touching distance — who are all over twenty-one.
It was a difficult road, from what Poe tells me, to get them to agree, but they did. And I’m so thankful for it. That so many people came out to support me.
But anyway, I came to the bar and then I saw.
Him I mean, standing with a group of his friends.
And then I froze.
For a moment or two.
And then I dove for the nearest brick pillar and hid.
Because what the fuck was I thinking? Why wasn’t I thinking actually?
Of course he’d be here.
He’s my boyfriend’s — ex-boyfriend’s — best friend.
He goes where Lucas goes. And vice-versa.