Total pages in book: 73
Estimated words: 71768 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 359(@200wpm)___ 287(@250wpm)___ 239(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 71768 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 359(@200wpm)___ 287(@250wpm)___ 239(@300wpm)
He nodded slowly, as if he was humoring me, and I tried not to let it piss me off. Instead I kept going. “Starting tonight. The last man standing after all the chaos gets future time off, whether it’s to go on a date, do a staycation here at the house barricaded in their room, or whether they want to order all the McDonald’s their stomachs can take and fall asleep in the fries.”
He made a face. “I don’t want to even think about how many times you’ve probably done that in your life.”
“Not telling.” I dropped his hand. “Is it a deal?”
“Of course.” He seemed to hover over me, or maybe he was just towering and I was mistaking it as a sexual hover like when you wanted to be close to someone but you didn’t want them to know that’s what you wanted. Ugh. What was I even thinking?
Focus!
“Great.” I stumbled back a bit.
He nodded and then went back into the house, seemingly unfazed by the howling I could hear escalating in the living room.
The guy was perfect.
He’d probably have laminated schedules for everyone before the end of the week, proving again just how out of my element I was.
Before the neighbors could wonder why I was pacing and muttering to myself on the front porch, I was saved by the DoorDash delivery lady, who handed me something that didn’t have gluten and something for the kids loaded with avocado and veggies that wouldn’t earn me another judgmental stare and a snarky lecture about the food pyramid.
Once I’d served the kids their vaguely nutritious dinner, I started picking up the kitchen and nearly choked when Rip made his way over to the sink. We didn’t speak, just stared into the dark window as we rinsed dishes and loaded the dishwasher.
We worked silently side by side, and as hard as I tried to avoid looking his way, his eyes finally caught mine in the reflection in the window. He didn’t look pissed off for once. He looked down as soon as he realized I saw him looking at me, but I couldn’t tell what he was thinking, and I desperately wanted to. Could he see how scared of all of this I really was? Or was he gearing up to mock my housekeeping skills again? I waited for the insult to come, the one that would break whatever tension was happening between us; instead he did something I hadn’t seen him do since… well, forever. Rip Edison smiled.
EIGHT
Rip
I called Banks first thing in the morning, to let him know I wouldn’t be coming in and that I was loaning Colby my office. She seemed genuinely excited to borrow it, but as I well knew, Colby’s excitement could sometimes backfire. I didn’t want Banks to get blindsided by her chaos, as humorous as that would be—for me at least.
He didn’t deserve that level of terror.
He answered on the first ring and yawned loudly into the phone. “Yellow?”
I rolled my eyes. “Dad jokes only work when you’re a dad…”
He barked out a laugh. “Had a woman call me daddy last night—that counts, right?”
“You’re disgusting.”
“Thank you, I can tell that really came from the heart. Did you call me to shower me with compliments, or do you finally need your best friend for once? I’m great with kids. Could probably give Colby some etiquette lessons—in fact—”
“—Are you going to let me talk?” I cringed when I heard the pitter-patter of feet dashing across the downstairs floor followed by the sound of something breaking and then Colby yelling, “blue chair” and “time-out.” “Colby’s going to head over in a while to use my office.”
I hoped, fast as I said it, that he’d only catch half of what I said because, let’s be honest, he had the attention span of a fly. Instead he was quiet on the other end of the phone.
A rarity.
Miracle, really.
“Are you sick?” he finally asked, his voice incredulous.
“What?” I pulled back and stared at my phone, then put it back to my ear. “No, I’m not sick.”
“Ohhhh, then you’re working from home today?”
“No, well, I mean, I’ll attempt to, but no. I came home last night to a disaster of one kid thinking she had live chickens in her stomach—long story—the other taunting her that she was going to die—even longer story—and the entire house in ruin. Colby was on the verge of tears and needs to hit her blog deadlines, whatever that means, so I offered her my office and we agreed to swap places for a week.”
Banks burst out laughing and then sobered. “Oh shit. You’re serious?”
“Of course I’m serious! Once she sees how—”
“Don’t finish that sentence, bro. Actually, you know what? Let me just put you on speakerphone so every single parent within a ten-mile radius can hear you make an ass of yourself.”