Total pages in book: 26
Estimated words: 25098 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 125(@200wpm)___ 100(@250wpm)___ 84(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 25098 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 125(@200wpm)___ 100(@250wpm)___ 84(@300wpm)
These last three months have been long and hard on me. Some days, I mentally kick myself because of the way I acted. Other days, I mentally kick Prim for what she did. Then I kick myself again as my gut twists. Then I kick her, and so on and so forth.
Mentally, I replay the last time Prim and I were together in my mind. She was so desperate to explain, but her explanation was so ludicrous too. An arranged marriage? What the fuck? Don’t those only happen in third world countries? Even more, my anger took over from my good sense and I could only see red, lashing out at her with venom on my tongue. Although it took time, I’ve come to realize we both could have handled that day better. The heat of the moment and the shock of what I was seeing made it impossible for me to act rationally.
Then again, Prim never should have kept that video from me. She shouldn’t have made it, period. She had more than enough time to tell me about it and about her plans for it. She had plenty of time to delete it, and yet she did none of those things. Instead, she fed me that half-assed story about trying to ruin herself so that she wouldn’t have to get married to some drug addict.
I snort with disgust, both at her and at myself. What a crock of bullshit because besides being angry, I feel betrayed too. I love her even though I knew she made poor decisions. I love her even though she’s young and foolish, and my heart twists in anguish.
So where does that leave us now?
I wish I could take back the words I said that day. I wish I had taken a deep breath and stepped out of the room to get my bearings before acting like a total dipshit asshole because what did it get me? Now, I’m lonely. I’m sad. But I thought I could trust Prim, and the anger still boils in my gut. After all, what’s a relationship without trust? A little white lie here and there? Fine. Taking a video of us having sex and not telling me? Planning to show it to other people? Absolutely not.
Even so, I wish I could rewind time to right before I was so hateful to Prim. But I can’t because it’s too late. My words were absolutely clear: she’s to never contact me again.
And she hasn’t tried, nor have I tried to reach out to her. The silence is agonizing and my voice echoes in the large space of my penthouse. Some days, I feel like a teenager waiting for the phone to ring.
But now, too much time has passed and she’s most likely gone back to her merry old life. What is she doing? Seeing men again? I snort. Probably. Maybe she’s even found a new patron. A rich man like me, most likely. Good luck to that bastard. But then I shake my head with disgust and longing. I love her and hate her at the same time, but even worse, I can’t stop thinking about her.
“When are you going to stop obsessing like a dumbfuck?” I curse in the empty room. When indeed?
I take another sip of coffee and flip to the back of the newspaper. But then something catches my eye, and my hands still. Holy fuck. It’s a photo of Prim, unsmiling, with a young man by her side, and the caption reads “Primrose Talbot, Samuel Coleman.” Fuck fuck fuck! This is a wedding announcement! Quickly, I scan the blurb. It seems she’s getting married today, in New Jersey somewhere. How the fuck did things turn around so fast? I was just making love to Prim three months ago, so when did she meet this guy?
But then a sentence in the announcement makes my heart go still: “Mr. Coleman recently returned from a stint in recovery in California.”
What the fuck?!?! Is this the drug addict she was trying to avoid? The one she was desperately trying to ditch, using our video? She’s actually MARRYING that loser? Even worse, everything she said is true?
My heart thumps uncontrollably. It’s all so clear now. Everything clicks into place in a split second.
I love her and I’ve made a terrible mistake. Yes, we’ve both made mistakes but at this moment, none of that seems to matter anymore. I check my watch. Fuck, the ceremony’s taking place in an hour. I have to go.
My wallet and keys are on the table next to the door and I grab them while dashing out to the elevator. Then I run to my car like my hair’s on fire and jump in before screeching out of the parking lot.
I don’t care. I’ve got to get to Prim.