Total pages in book: 105
Estimated words: 104151 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 521(@200wpm)___ 417(@250wpm)___ 347(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 104151 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 521(@200wpm)___ 417(@250wpm)___ 347(@300wpm)
“But,” he continued, “very few things in my life have gone as planned, so I can’t promise I’ll remain steadfast in my resolve to do the right thing. This is my preemptive apology for if or when I fuck it all up.” The wood beneath his feet creaked as he took a step closer.
My lips parted to accommodate my labored breathing. I liked his vulnerability. And I liked that he was unapologetic about saying “fuck” around me.
“Eve—”
“Is this a warning or a promise?” I couldn’t look at him and act confident, so I continued down the four stairs to the yard. “Because I’m terrible at heeding warnings but relentless at making people keep their promises.”
CHAPTER TWELVE
GEORGE MICHAEL, “I WANT YOUR SEX”
Eve
“You said what?” Erin gasped as I stared at the ceiling from my bed with the phone cradled between my ear and shoulder.
“What was I supposed to say? I just spewed the first thing that came to mind. That’s totally not true. My initial reaction was to scream and beg him to be reckless with me.”
She laughed. “I would have frozen. Choked and tripped over my tongue or said something stupid and embarrassing. I’m so jealous that you had the perfect line. What did he do after you said that?”
I curled the phone cord around my finger and grinned. “I don’t know. I didn’t look back. I would have died. My confidence had a ten-second lifespan. So I got the heck out of there, trying so hard to walk and not run. But my heart was pounding, and I couldn’t hear anything around me.”
“What’s next? When do you see him again? What are you going to do or say when you do? How can you not be thinking about him thinking about being reckless with you? Gah! And what does that mean? Like … kissing you? Or more? Eve! Would you do more with him? Would you have sex with him?”
Erin’s endless string of questions fed my nerves to the point of panic. What was I going to say and do? “Okay. We both need to get a grip. He didn’t say anything was going to happen. I think he felt bad for what he said on Saturday. Maybe that’s it. He said it out of pity. Maybe he rolled his eyes at my gullibility when I walked away.”
“No. Don’t be ridiculous. I’ll admit, I thought he was leading you on, but I’ve changed my mind. Have you looked in the mirror? You’re gorgeous. And you are an adult now. He’s older, but not like old enough to be your dad. And he’s not married. Josh likes you. Think about it. There’s no reason for him not to be attracted to you except for all the reasons he already told you. So stop thinking that he’s not really into you. I’m a terrible friend for making you think that. Just forget it. Okay?”
I nibbled on my thumbnail and mumbled, “Yeah, maybe. But I can’t do anything. I can’t make a move on him because if, by some chance, he is just appeasing me, I can’t risk looking like a fool. I’d never be able to look at him again, and that would be difficult since he’s my neighbor and goes to church every Sunday, and my parents have basically adopted him and Josh.”
“You’re right.” Erin blew out a slow breath.
I loved that she was physically feeling these emotions with me.
“So play it cool. Be charming and sexy, but not desperate and awkward.”
I giggled. “Charming and sexy? I’m afraid in my attempt to be charming and sexy, I’ll look desperate and awkward. I think I should pretend he didn’t say anything and try my best to act normal.”
“Fine, go with your idea. But I think mine is better.”
Erin’s idea was better, and I could have pulled it off with some other guy who was closer to my age and who I didn’t think about every second of every day. But Kyle wasn’t that guy.
My plan worked—maybe too well.
On Monday, Kyle didn’t give anything away. It was as if the moment never happened, so I had no problem acting normal. He didn’t allow me a chance to act otherwise. Tuesday was a repeat of Monday. The normalcy was good yet maddening. I started to feel crazy like I made it all up in my head.
School started on Wednesday, so I didn’t see Kyle in the morning. He dropped Josh off at school, and I was waiting at the end of their lane when he got off the bus in the afternoon. Two hours later, Kyle got home from practice.
“Hey,” he smiled, depositing his keys on the counter.
I turned from the puzzle Josh and I were working on at the table. “Hey.”
“Buddy, how was your first day of kindergarten?” Kyle asked, resting his hands on Josh’s shoulder and kissing the top of his head.