Total pages in book: 105
Estimated words: 104151 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 521(@200wpm)___ 417(@250wpm)___ 347(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 104151 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 521(@200wpm)___ 417(@250wpm)___ 347(@300wpm)
“Are you going home too?” he asked, threading his arms through his wet shirt.
“I’m going to hang out here until I dry off more.” With my legs dangling over the dock’s edge, I leaned back, gazing at the heavens.
“I can’t leave you here alone.”
“Why?”
“If anything happened—”
“Bears?” I asked.
“Animals. Creepy people in the woods. Anything.”
I lifted onto my elbows and caught him looking at me. “You think there are creepy people in the woods?”
After a shrug, he tucked his chin and kicked at the gravel. “Anything’s possible.”
“Huh.” I leaned back again. “It might not look like it, but I was a late bloomer. All of my friends got curves and breasts before I did. Then, last summer, boom! I got ‘em. It made me think of Creation. In her seventeenth year of life, God gave Eve boobs, and it was good. Hmm … perhaps that’s more like The Big Bang Theory.”
My head lulled to the side as Kyle fought his reaction, rubbing his fingers over his lips to hide his grin. That was his thing. He did it a lot with me. Then, his body started shaking with laughter.
My new favorite thing was making him laugh and smile when he didn’t want to.
“Eve,” he shook his head, reeling in his reaction and regaining his composure. “You’re a handful.”
“You mean fun.”
“I mean evil. And I need you to go home so I can sleep in peace, knowing you’re nestled into your bed instead of alone on this dock.”
“I wouldn’t be alone if you’d lie next to me and trust that Gabby already has Josh in bed, and she’s probably talking to a friend on the phone.” I closed my eyes.
After a minute of hesitation, I felt him lie next to me.
“Attaboy.” I grinned.
“I’m older. I should be the influencer, but I fear you’re the bad influence on me.”
“Because I’m fun?”
He hesitated, and I wanted to peek into his brain to see everything I knew he wouldn’t say.
“You’re … something.”
I giggled. “I’m going to pretend you think I’m something good.”
He neither confirmed nor denied my assumption.
“Does Josh know his mom?” I held my breath, hoping he wouldn’t up and leave me.
“No.”
“Does he ask about her?”
“No.”
I waited to ask another question because I didn’t want to upset him by sounding overly anxious for answers. “And you weren’t married?”
“No.”
“Me neither.”
Kyle chuckled.
“Do you have a good relationship with your family? I think my father would disown me if I had a baby out of wedlock. And since your brother is a pastor too, I bet he wasn’t happy. Huh?”
“We have an older sister who has been arrested twice and to rehab more times than I can count. And she’s had at least two abortions that I know of. My family loves Josh. And I have a good enough relationship with them. I can’t be responsible for anyone’s happiness but my own. Even Josh will grow up and find his own way in life, and his happiness will be out of my control.”
I couldn’t be with Kyle and not have my crush on him intensify. The problem was that no matter how hard I tried to convince everyone else that I was an adult, he made me feel like a young girl with hearts in my eyes and unrealistic dreams of falling for the guy who consumed my every thought. But my tenacity was bigger than all of that self-doubt. So I rolled toward him, resting my head on my outstretched arm.
His head lulled to the side, gazing at me.
“I want to live like you,” I said.
Lines formed along his forehead.
“I want to feel in control of my happiness. I don’t want to live my life for anyone else. And if I make mistakes, I want to find something good to take from them. I want to be fearless.”
The corner of his mouth twitched. “You think I’m fearless.”
“Well, I think you seem fearless. You’re raising a child on your own. Maybe you’re just doing a good job of acting brave and mature. I’m trying to be brave by not attending college because I don’t want to conform. I don’t want to be part of the herd. I just want to be myself and go wherever that leads me. Maybe that means I’ll spend most of my life doing odd jobs like cleaning motel rooms. I might not have a big house or a fancy car, but I don’t care. I want my work to be an afterthought. Ya know? When someone thinks of Eve Jacobson, I want them to think, ‘Oh, yeah. Eve loves to fish, stargaze, skip rocks along the water, pick apples and bake pies, dance to good music, go to the movies with friends, and make love in fields of wildflowers.’ I don’t want them thinking, ‘There’s Eve Jacobson; she cleans motel rooms and never went to college.’ But that’s what they’ll think. So I want to be fearless like you and not care what they think.”