Total pages in book: 47
Estimated words: 46858 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 234(@200wpm)___ 187(@250wpm)___ 156(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 46858 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 234(@200wpm)___ 187(@250wpm)___ 156(@300wpm)
With Eli, it feels like I can put myself out there more….
But I have to be careful not to put myself out there too much.
I swear, I’d never betray your trust. You have my word.
CHAPTER 10
Elias
I sit in my office at the school, attempting to focus as I walk one of the students through a math problem.
She’s a young woman, perhaps around Della’s age, wearing an outfit that seems slightly inappropriate for studying.
I withhold judgment since it’s not my place to decide what people wear. People…yeah, but when I claim my woman with more than texts, I’ll have a say then.
I’ll make sure she keeps certain parts of herself hidden, just for me, the same way I wouldn’t want to share parts of myself with others.
But this woman can wear what she wants. I have no claim to her.
I ignore the niggling thought telling me I don’t have a claim to Della.
Last night, after deleting the video and photo, we texted some more about her so-called friend. I learned her name, Jess, and dozens of little snippets into their twisted ‘friendship.’
Jess had a sneaky way of complimenting me, Della told me. She’d always make it sound like a compliment on one level, but there was always a slight dig in there. But she was clever about it. She always did it in such a way that I wasn’t sure. I was always doubting myself and downplaying my own feelings. I know this probably seems like silly high school stuff.
No, I responded, gritting my teeth as rage flared in me. You don’t have to downplay your feelings with me, Della. You never have to do that.
I realize I’ve drifted off.
The student – her name is Lisa or Luna, I think – is looking at me, mouth opening and closing. Her words come through a fog of memory.
After deleting Della’s video and photo – I’d die before betraying her trust – all I wanted was to find her physically.
I even told her that much.
My brother’s here, she responded. I’m not sure how he’d react. Maybe we should take it a bit slower?
That made me want to howl.
There is no slow where we’re concerned.
I’m doing it again. Luna-or-Lisa is still talking to me.
“I’m sorry?” I say, deciding I won’t use her name.
I need to get my act together. I can’t allow my obsession with Della to affect my work. Which is like saying I can’t let the sun melt ice, because that’s what she’s doing, every single second. She’s melting me.
The woman flinches, then smiles, flicking her hair with one hand and adjusting her fishnet stockings with the other.
“You seem distracted, Eli.”
“Elias,” I say, even if it makes me seem uptight.
My dad chose my name. It was my grandfather’s, and it meant a lot to him. Few people call me Eli. I promised my dad when I was a kid that I wouldn’t shorten it.
Della is different.
She flinches again. “Okay, Elias… I was wondering if there was anything I could do to help?”
I’m relieved I kept the door open. The last thing I want is for her to take this rejection personally.
It happens from time to time, the students behaving inappropriately toward me. I don’t much like it, and I have never enjoyed the concept of people sleeping together for the sheer physical release of it.
The issue was I never thought I’d find a woman who made me want the real thing.
But now I have.
Standing, I gesture to the clock. “Unfortunately, stress is part of my job. I’ve got another student arriving soon. But if you need anything, please feel free to reach out to me.”
When she leaves, I shut the door and return to my desk.
Taking out my phone, I remind myself of what Della and I had agreed to last night.
We can’t act on this at the school, I told her. I’m proud of the work I do there. I don’t want to put it in jeopardy.
Eli I feel like I’ll go crazy when we see each other in person again. It won’t even seem real. But don’t worry. I won’t jump your bones.
Despite what we said, I feel a physical pull, a compulsion to get close to her.
Are you still in class? I text, not giving myself time to delete it.
No, I’m in the library, she replies. Why?
Did you need any more help with your math?
I go to the window, looking out at the green. The clouds have shielded the sun almost entirely, but shafts of sunlight sneak in, making me think of Della and me… that’s what she’s doing, pushing aside the clouds, letting me see the sun.
I was wondering when you were going to suggest that, she replies. Are you sure? We can’t do anything, you know….
I know, I reply, even as my cock stiffens at the memory of last night.