Total pages in book: 43
Estimated words: 40859 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 204(@200wpm)___ 163(@250wpm)___ 136(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 40859 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 204(@200wpm)___ 163(@250wpm)___ 136(@300wpm)
“And just that easy I’m supposed to be safe.”
I shake my head, “nothing easy about negotiating with men in that world, but Almanza family is the best option to take control of what Diaz was runnin’. That’s all I can do in that world. My world, no one will come close enough to you again to remotely pose a threat. Almanza and Devil’s Due taking your back is icing on the cake, baby.”
She doesn’t say anything more as I wash her hair for her. Once I get her out of the bath and dried off, I move her to her bedroom. Finding pajamas, she allows me to help her dress. As much as I want to kiss her, touch her, caress her, tonight isn’t the night.
“I gotta shower babe, get some rest.” I tell her turning on her shower.
I move around noticing she’s staying in the doorway. Knowing now is the not the time to push for anything physical I wash myself quickly before stepping out to dry off.
“Buttercup, you can go to bed.”
“I rather like this view,” she teases then yawns.
Shaking my head, I move to her room taking her by the hand leaving my clothes and towel on the bathroom floor. She climbs in bed and I move around to her other side. Climbing in, I lay on my back as she snuggles in beside me half draped on me. Willing my cock down, I lay there holding her.
She doesn’t relax into sleep. I kiss the top of her head. “Gotta let it all go, buttercup. For you and for Benny.”
“Jennings,” she says into the darkness of her room, “why haven’t you kissed me since we got home?”
“Because you aren’t ready. I kiss you, it turns to more, you aren’t ready for that. You need some time to process today. I’m gonna give you that time.”
She lets out a sigh and I’m not sure if it’s relief or disappointment.
“Baby, I’m not going anywhere. I know what I want and it’s right here in this bed.”
“Are you always so confident?”
“Yeah,” I tell her the truth, “now sleep.”
She shifts again pulling in closer, but doesn’t speak. It takes her some time but she does drift off.
I lay in bed looking to her ceiling. How do I keep the nightmares away? I can keep her safe from my world, but can I keep her safe from me? The thoughts plague me all night. In the morning she begins to stir as I sit fully dressed on a chair in her room. She extends her arm in the bed looking for me.
Sitting up, she calls out, “Jennings.”
“Right here, buttercup.”
“Why are you over there?”
“Better place for me to be right this minute, baby.”
“Are you leaving?”
“I’m thinking we should talk.”
She jumps up out of the bed and marches over to me. “Oh no, no way. I have been through hell. You tell me you’ll be patient. You tell me I’m not ready, and now you want to have some talk. You said I’m in my head. Well, get out of your own, Jennings.”
“There is a lot to me you don’t know, Michele.” I give her the truth.
She shakes her head. “No,” the tears fill her eyes. “I’m trying to be free. I told you my life here matters. I want to see what this spark might be. Even if it doesn’t work out, I want to take that risk.”
Her fire brings me to life as I grab her wrists and pull her to me. I can’t resist as her lips crash to mine. She climbs on my lap and presses against me.
Breathlessly, I pull away. “You gotta know something, Michele.”
“If you tell me you’re a serial killer, I will stab you in the balls. I didn’t take it well when Benny told me what his occupation was. I don’t care what you and your brothers or club are into Jennings as long as you come home to me. I don’t want to know what you and your club are doing as long as you and me are doing you and me. I have learned I don’t need to know anything but what I feel and what you feel. If it ain’t about that, don’t tell me!”
I almost want to smile. She couldn’t be better suited for my lifestyle. “As much as I want this, I can’t do it without telling you. We can’t sleep together.”
She laughs, full out belly laughs. “Now, I know it’s been crazy and maybe you hit your head, but Jennings I’ve seen your penis, it works. We can indeed sleep together.”
I smirk, “I’m happy to know you are into my penis and it working, but,” and I drop my face watching hers, “you need to know I can’t sleep beside you. I don’t ever want to hurt you. Sometimes I have nightmares, vivid ones from my time in service. I can hallucinate.”