Total pages in book: 59
Estimated words: 75754 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 379(@200wpm)___ 303(@250wpm)___ 253(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 75754 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 379(@200wpm)___ 303(@250wpm)___ 253(@300wpm)
Then he hung up.
I dropped the phone and ran back into the living room to see the door closing behind the trooper.
Garrison looked white as a ghost.
Sterling didn’t look anything.
He was just blank.
Which didn’t last for long when he stalked past me and into the room, returning moments later with his cut on over his bare skin, and the key to his motorcycle in his hand.
“Where are you going?” I asked.
“Out.”
I stopped him by putting my back to the door, blocking it.
Although I knew it wouldn’t work very well, and that he could get past me easily, he stopped.
Mostly for my benefit, I was sure, but I couldn’t let him leave.
Not like this.
Not in this state of mind.
“Where are you going?” I asked again.
“To a bar. I need to get drunk,” he said stiffly.
I raised a brow at him. “Do you think that’ll help right now? Look at Garrison. Do you think he needs you to go drinking when he needs you?”
Sterling stared blankly at me.
Garrison snorted. “I can take care of myself; actually, a drink sounds pretty fucking amazing right now.”
With that he disappeared into his room that was off the living room, and returned moments later with a t-shirt on and his feet rammed into boots sloppily.
Sterling never moved, staring at me like he didn’t even know me.
I just knew this was a horrible idea.
A really bad, no good one.
These two didn’t need to go get drunk.
They could get drunk here…but not out where they could potentially ruin their lives…ruin someone else’s lives.
Then Sterling started towards me, and I knew instantly he wasn’t going to stop.
I moved out of the way, knowing if I stayed there he’d just move me…or plow right through me.
But then only seconds after the door was yanked open by Sterling, I heard the blissful sound of pipes.
Multiple ones.
Coming up to Garrison’s house fast.
I closed my eyes in relief as first Loki, then Trance, followed shortly by Sebastian pulled up into the front of Garrison’s house.
“Fuck,” Sterling hissed. “Motherfuck!”
I visibly cringed when Sterling turned his now very pissed off eyes to me.
My body slid behind Garrison’s porch post, and I hid my face so Sterling could no longer see me directly.
The light from the porch wasn’t on, and the streetlight only did so much.
Which meant he couldn’t see my tear filled eyes at what that look had done to me.
God.
This was horrible.
More bikes pulled up, and I finally felt it was okay to go into the house, knowing that they wouldn’t let him do anything stupid.
My feet took me into the kitchen where I grabbed a bottle of water from the fridge and took it into the bedroom that Garrison had given the two of us to sleep in.
I fell face first into the comforter, then cried my little heart out until I felt the bed dip.
I turned my tear filled eyes to see Sawyer standing there, with Lily behind her.
“Hey,” I croaked.
***
Two hours later, the tequila that Sawyer had been able to confiscate from the boys outside started talking.
“It’s my fault. Had the fire not happened…they wouldn’t have even been here,” I whispered to Sawyer and Lily.
Lily hugged me tightly.
“It’s not your fault you have psycho neighbors,” she whispered.
Tears coursed down my face, and I pulled away from her.
“It is. If I’d never had come…” I shook my head.
“If you’d never have come, I wouldn’t be here right now.”
My eyes closed.
Sterling’s voice sounded low and devastated.
Pain practically dripped from each of his words, but when I turned to look at him, he looked unaffected.
“What?” I asked. “Why would you say that?”
“Because you’re what kept me alive during that mission. You’re what had me going…I pulled every one of my team out of a hostile situation. Everyone but me was down…and you were the only one that kept me going. Your eyes. Your smile. Your voice. You. Had it not been for you, I, and all of them, would’ve been dead,” he explained softly.
The tears on my cheeks started to cool, and I looked at him wide eyed.
“You never said,” I whispered.
He shrugged as if it made no difference. “I’m not allowed to tell you. I’m not even allowed to tell you that I had a debriefing three days ago.”
And he was telling me now, because he didn’t want me to blame myself.
But I still did.
But it was obvious that I needed to be more careful what I said in front of him.
“Thank you,” I said. “Can I get you anything?”
“A new heart?” He asked, laughing humorlessly. “Mine seems to be broken at the moment.”
I stood up, feeling Sawyer and Lily slip their hands off my shoulders as I went.
Then walked straight to my man and wrapped him in a hug so tight that it would’ve broken any other person.
Not my Sterling, though.
He was solid.
Formidable.
Unbreakable.
“You okay?” I asked softly.
I could smell the whiskey on his breath.
And I was sure he could smell the tequila on mine.
“No…” he whispered into my hair as he wrapped his arms around me. “I’m not even a little bit okay.”
“I’m so sorry,” I breathed, hugging him even tighter.
He took the hug, and gave as good as he got.
“I’m ready to pass out and forget,” he said.
I looked up into his eyes.
“Okay. We’ll think about the rest tomorrow.”
Because there were plans to be made.
I’d already heard about him and Garrison having to go up to the morgue tomorrow and identify Cormac’s body.
Funeral arrangements.
I felt Lily’s lips on my cheek, followed shortly by Sawyer’s hug that captured both me and Sterling.
“Your girls are weird,” he rumbled once they left.
“They love you,” I told him.
He took a deep breath.
“Yeah.”
“Let’s go to bed,” I whispered.
Maybe tomorrow would look better, because surely one couple couldn’t suffer anymore…right?
Wrong.
Chapter 17
When a woman starts a sentence off with, “I just find it funny…” That means you should run. Fast. Because nothing is remotely funny to her. In fact, it’s the exact fucking opposite.
-Words of wisdom
Ruthie
Two days later
I’d never been in a biker procession before.
Never seen the sheer perfection of it.