Total pages in book: 67
Estimated words: 68102 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 341(@200wpm)___ 272(@250wpm)___ 227(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 68102 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 341(@200wpm)___ 272(@250wpm)___ 227(@300wpm)
“Sofia Anisimov, you look at me right now.”
The controlled command in his voice had her gaze rising immediately, unable to stop herself.
“That’s better.” He cupped her chin and the warmth of his skin was almost a shock to her system, even though she hadn’t thought she was cold. The water had been hot, the bathroom was steamy, so why was she so cold?
She tried to pull back. She didn’t deserve his touch. But the pain in her back stopped her, along with the look on his face as he eyed her sternly.
“You weren’t given permission to move.”
Her eyes widened. “I have to have permission to move?”
“At the moment, you do. Because, right now, I think you’re struggling to cope, aren’t you, lass?”
Oh, man.
She loved it when his accent grew thicker. That brogue that rolled off his tongue seemed to weave a magic web around her, instantly making her relax.
Well. Some parts of her instantly relaxed.
Other parts came to life.
Dear Lord.
He just seemed to have this effect on her. It wasn’t something that she could keep in check. Even when it made her feel like she was completely out of control of her life.
“Sofia? Are you finding it hard to cope? Just nod if that’s true.”
She nodded.
“That’s a good girl. The first step is admitting it.”
She wasn’t admitting to a drug or alcohol problem. But she understood what he was talking about.
“You’re spiraling, aren’t you? Panic is making it hard to breathe? Are you finding everything overstimulating?”
How did he know?
“My ma used to get overwhelmed at times,” he admitted to her. “She used to have to go off to a room by herself and just stay quiet and still in the dark. But I think you might be a bit different. I don’t think you need to be alone. No, because I have a feeling that you talk even worse about yourself in your head than you do out loud. Don’t you, lass?”
Yikes.
Why was he looking so . . . so stern?
And why was it so entrancing? Why could she not look away?
“Now, we haven’t been able to talk about our relationship at all because we haven’t really had one. But that’s gonna change soon. This isn’t the time to talk that all through, however. Because right now, I need to get you settled and relaxed. So this is what is going to happen.”
He was speaking English. She knew he was. She recognized each individual word. But somehow, putting them all together was too much for her frazzled mind to handle.
“Yeah, I know it’s too much, baby. I get it. I’m going to stop giving you choices and explanations soon.”
Did she not want choices?
What was happening?
16
“This is what I need you to pay attention to. I’m going to take over. I’m making all the decisions regarding your care. But the ultimate choice is always yours. If you don’t want that, shake your head now.”
She . . . she didn’t want to make any decisions, though. Tears slid down her cheeks.
“I get it, baby. I really do.” He brushed her tears away. “Just one more small decision, then, I’ll take them all away. You trust me to take care of you, to take over?”
She shook her head and his face grew pensive. “Fair enough.”
Then she nodded.
His lips quirked. “Right. I might need a few words from you, lass.”
“I . . . trust . . . you. But . . . don’t want . . . to . . . hurt.”
“I’m not going to hurt you. If at any time you need this to stop, if you need me to pull back, then you say Red. Can you do that?”
She guessed. She shrugged with a nod.
Colm didn’t look too happy at that though. What had she done?
“Or you tap. Tap my hand twice. Like this.” He grabbed her hand and tapped it twice on top of his. “Got it?”
She nodded. That wasn’t really complicated.
If she needed him to stop, she either said Red or tapped his hand. But she wasn’t quite sure why he’d want to help her.
“Why?” she whispered.
He cupped the side of her face. “Let’s not worry about that right now. You’re not worrying about anything tonight. I’m going to help you because I want to. And you’re going to let me because it’s what is best for you.”
She wanted to roll her eyes at him, but that would require energy she just didn’t have.
“First things first; we need to get you out of there.” He reached for her, but she flinched back instinctively, stifling a gasp of pain.
“That hurt you,” he murmured. “Your back?”
“S-sorry.” Sofia hadn’t meant to flinch away from him. Unfortunately, at this point in her life, it was just a trauma response. For the past few months, the bulk of physical attention she’d received was Oleg hurting her for one reason or another.