Total pages in book: 137
Estimated words: 138683 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 693(@200wpm)___ 555(@250wpm)___ 462(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 138683 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 693(@200wpm)___ 555(@250wpm)___ 462(@300wpm)
I held up the other picture that was incredibly good. “And here, this one is from Lynette. That’s the fountain that is right outside your window. Look…there were birds in it that day. Five of them.”
I counted them out for him.
I had to wonder if he was in his head thinking, No shit, Sherlock.
I so badly wished I knew.
I set them aside.
Normally, I could ramble at him all day, talking about everything and nothing. It wasn’t like words didn’t come easily for me.
But today, it felt like a lie. Like dishonesty.
I eased to the edge of the chair, and I sat forward and gathered both his hands between mine. I squeezed tight as I let the confession ride into the air. “I left Karl, Bobby. I left him because he wasn’t good to me or good for me. Because my heart aches to find its freedom. To find love and joy.”
Was it selfish? Wanting those things for myself when Bobby would never have them?
“I’m living with a friend now. It’s kind of weird and awkward, mostly because he’s stupid hot, and I don’t know what to do with myself when I’m around him.”
I got so sweaty every time Milo was around, I worried I was having hot flashes.
“Don’t worry. I’m safe there. Milo is kind. A total good guy. You’d definitely like him.” My tongue stroked out to wet my dried lips. “I’m going to be honest and tell you that I’m scared. I’m scared that I won’t be able to figure this out on my own. That I’ll let you down. But I want you to know I’ll never let that happen. I’ll do whatever it takes. I’ll take care of you. Always. I promise I will find a way.”
Pushing to my feet, I leaned over him so I could press my lips to his temple. “I love you so much, big brother. Mad, mad love.”
Tears stinging at the backs of my eyes, I pressed the charm back into his hand. I curled his fingers around it and held it tight as I whispered, “I hope you at least know that.”
Blinking away the moisture, I stood and walked from his room.
I followed the couple halls into the administration area. I knocked on Nancy’s door that rested halfway open.
She looked up from her desk. “Tessa, hey, come in.”
“Hi.”
Her brow dented in worry. “Is everything okay?”
I gulped around the torment and eased down onto one of the chairs across from her. “Can you let me know how far Bobby is paid up to?”
Concern played through her eyes, but without saying anything, she shifted so she could type on her keyboard and look at the screen that was angled off to the side.
“He’s paid until the end of the month.”
That was like…three weeks.
I tried to swallow around the grapefruit-sized ball of dread lodged in my throat.
“Has something happened?”
“No, no, everything’s fine, I just wanted to make sure the last payment came through,” I lied.
Clearly, she picked up on my agitation because she studied me for a beat before she turned and dug into a drawer and pulled out some pamphlets. “We love having Bobby as a resident, but there are other options if you need them.”
She passed the pamphlets toward me.
The top one was for a state funded facility in San Francisco.
I felt sick.
“Thank you,” I whispered as I gathered them and stood.
I made a silent promise that I wouldn’t need them.
I ducked out of her office and hurried down the hall with my head lowered, not wanting to face any of the caretakers who would definitely pick up on the fact that something was off.
I usually came through here trying to brighten everyone’s day.
This place often radiated sadness.
I knew it wore and whittled and cut. It was hard. Both for residents, the caretakers, and the family members who came to visit.
I pushed out the front doors and into the bright morning light, inhaling deeply as the fear of what I’d done rushed up from the depths where I’d tried to keep it contained.
Guilt and worry filled my chest to overflowing. I struggled to breathe. To fight off the panic that sank into my skin like sharp talons.
I started in the direction of Milo’s SUV he’d let me borrow, almost at a run because I had to get out of there before I had a breakdown.
I screamed when a hand wrapped around my arm from behind.
Hatred.
Disgust.
Revulsion.
They roiled through my body.
I whirled around so fast it tore my arm out of Karl’s hold. “What the hell are you doing here?” I demanded, trying to keep the shaking out of my voice.
I doubted he’d pull anything in public. He had his reputation to uphold, after all. But I couldn’t handle him here.
Near Bobby.
By the one person who meant the most to me, who Karl had wielded like manipulation.