Total pages in book: 87
Estimated words: 83520 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 418(@200wpm)___ 334(@250wpm)___ 278(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 83520 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 418(@200wpm)___ 334(@250wpm)___ 278(@300wpm)
The conversations taking place around us grind to a halt as people turn and listen.
I blink, surprised that she’s making such a public apology. Kingsley throws his arm around her shoulder and tugs her close before whispering something in her ear.
Summer and Austin have been so protective of each other. Neither wants to see the other get hurt. And the students of Hawthorne Prep haven’t exactly been welcoming to them since their arrival.
So…I get it.
And I can forgive.
Her behavior was never malicious.
“It’s all right.”
Her eyes soften as she shakes her head. “It’s not.” There’s a pause. “After what happened with Jasper at the beginning of the school year, I assumed you were playing games.”
“I would never deliberately hurt him,” I whisper.
I want the best for Austin and care more than I’m willing to admit. Even privately to myself. I can only hope that with enough time, my feelings will eventually fade into nothingness.
“I know. It’s why I was so angry. I couldn’t understand how I could have been so wrong about you.”
Air leaks slowly from my lungs. After more than a month of tension, it feels like Summer and I have finally come to a place of understanding. Maybe now, we’ll be able to bury the past and start fresh.
Just when I assume she’ll drop the topic, she says in a low voice, “I know Austin made a lot of mistakes, but he really does care about you.”
Even though I try to stomp out the sadness before it can wreak further havoc, I’m not quick enough. It rushes through my veins, suffusing every cell.
My teeth rake across my lower lip as I contemplate a response. What I won’t do is give her false hope where there is none to be found. As painful as this separation is, it’s been good for me. I’m standing on my own two feet and finding my own way in the world. I’ve become my own person.
One who isn’t afraid to branch out and take a few risks.
What I’m not doing is lurking in the shadows, hiding behind either of these boys.
Unable to hold her searching gaze, I glance away. My attention is immediately ensnared by dark green eyes, and my heart stutters to a standstill before thundering in my chest.
No matter how much time slips by, my reaction to Austin Hawthorne is always the same and just as visceral. It’s as if he became an integral part of me and I have no idea how to purge him from my system.
What scares me most is that the longing I feel deep in my soul will never fade. It’ll always be a part of me.
AUSTIN
With my arms folded behind my head, I stare at the ceiling as my mind tumbles over the past month. All the ways I fucked up and hurt Delilah.
The distance that now separates us is as wide as an ocean and impossible to cross.
In hindsight, I can’t blame her for insisting on it. I was an asshole and should have placed more trust in her.
Even though every instinct is prodding me to pursue her with a single-mindedness, I’ve done as she requested and kept my distance.
It’s fucking torture.
She’s like the sun, and all I want to do is revolve around her brilliance.
You need to let me go.
Those six words cut me to the core and make me feel like I’ll bleed out.
Deep down, I know if I’d laid my hands on her, I could have changed her mind. But how could I do that after the hell I put her through?
The answer is that I couldn’t.
I wasn’t lying when I told her that I loved her. I’ve never said that to anyone else other than family.
But I do.
I love Delilah.
It’s for that reason I need to make my peace with her decision. If she honestly doesn’t believe I’m what’s best, then I need to move on. Although it doesn’t feel like I’ll ever get over her. She’ll forever lurk in the back of my brain and in my heart as the one who got away.
The one I allowed to slip through my fingers.
And that sucks.
The knock on the closed bedroom door jerks me from those depressing thoughts. Before I can tell whoever it is to go away, Summer pokes her head inside the room.
“Hey.” Her voice is tentative as if I’m minutes away from leaping off the nearest skyscraper.
I grunt out a response. It’s the best I can muster under the circumstances.
What’s funny is that I’ve never had a problem shaking off past relationships and moving on in the blink of an eye. I’d go so far as to say it’s always been a relief when they ended.
This is anything but.
This feels like someone plunged their hand into my chest and ripped out my beating heart before holding it up for everyone to inspect.