Total pages in book: 36
Estimated words: 32140 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 161(@200wpm)___ 129(@250wpm)___ 107(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 32140 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 161(@200wpm)___ 129(@250wpm)___ 107(@300wpm)
That threat worked for a while, but it wasn’t enough to stop it forever. Over the years things got worse, and my mother and I got better at hiding the evidence. Me by covering up from my neck down and her by doing drugs and drinking. Then one day, he got into a bar fight, messed with the wrong person and found a bullet in his head. That was that. I thought we were finally free, but I was wrong.
From there it was a long line of men coming and going, some just simply disgusting drunks, or ones putting white lines up their nose which she also indulged in. Usually both of them were so coked out I was able to hide in my room and come and go without incident. Other times the guy would be no better than my dad and I would spend the time dodging their anger and bottles and furniture.
I got brave one of the days it was just she and I and asked her about my biological father. She looked at me like I had a double head. All she would say was he was no better than the rest of them other than he was rich. She said he used her and when she needed him, he was nowhere to be found. That was the day I began to suspect he didn’t know about me.
Over the summer going into my senior year when I met James, he seemed the complete opposite of what I was used to. He was older than me by two years and had this pretend bad boy vibe kind of like Danny Zuko from Grease. He was the opposite of what I expected, so much so that I wasn’t sure how to act around him. Whenever he would raise his hand, even though it was to move my hair out of my face, I would close my eyes and flinch, preparing myself for the blow. Eventually, I learned to accept the best and that is when the worst started.
I had just gotten a job at the local bar and grill, hellbent on saving money to get the hell out of here after graduation which, come to think of it, is the swan song for most girls growing up in this town's undesirable area with no opportunities, money, or jobs. We simply work to move on. James would give me a ride to and from work like the perfect doting boyfriend. A few times he stayed during my shift and at first it seemed fine. But one day afterward, he questioned me like the freaking cops about the bartender, Royce, asking me if he had hit on me or if something was going on between us. I looked at him like he was crazy.
The truth is I can get what he is saying because every night when I work I can feel Royce’s eyes on me. Hell, I can practically feel the burn of his gaze as if I were naked. He makes conversation, moving close to me throughout the night and I would be lying if I didn't admit it makes my stomach feel funny. Hell, I swear one time he walked behind me, and his fingers grazed my hips while he sniffed me, but before I could turn around he was gone. He might have mentioned once or twice how I was too good for James and that I deserved better, but I really had no clue what he meant since at the time nothing had happened.
Toward the beginning of school James began pressuring me to have sex with him. We had talked about it before, and I explained that I wasn’t ready, and I wanted to focus on school. He told me he understood. So when he started pushing the issue I was confused and a bit sad but didn’t want to make a big deal out of it. I tried placating him with kisses and I even did things to him, but that only appeased him for so long.
The three weeks after school started was the first time he hit me. We were on our way home from the movies but instead of him driving me home, he drove to the lookout which is a known spot where people makeout and have sex. My heart began pounding, my alert going off in my head. I made sure to have my purse in my hand ready to bolt. Out of nowhere he gripped the back of my head and when I looked in his eyes, I saw anger and a monster.
“It’s time to stop playing games,” he told me, reaching for my jacket.
“James, please. I have school tomorrow. Can we talk about this later?” I tried making my voice soft and rubbing his face.
“No. I am done fucking letting you lead me around by my dick. I want what I have paid for.” My head jerks back not sure what he meant until it hits me. He thinks all of the dates he has taken me on amounts to payment.