Total pages in book: 247
Estimated words: 235897 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 1179(@200wpm)___ 944(@250wpm)___ 786(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 235897 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 1179(@200wpm)___ 944(@250wpm)___ 786(@300wpm)
Andarna lifts her head and narrows her accusing golden eyes at me.
“I know.” I put my hands up in the universal sign of surrender.
“You know that’s not how I feel about it,” Sawyer says as his arms start to tremble. “We’ve been over this! Any rider would have done the same in my position.” He shakes his head and reaches for the next scale, then pulls himself upward, gaining a foot of hard-fought distance. “Of course I don’t blame you! That’s not—” His head whips sideways, toward Sliseag’s. “No, I’m not punishing— For Amari’s sake, will you just let me get a word in?”
From the silence that follows, Sliseag does not comply.
I shift my weight as my pack grows heavier by the minute, and my lower spine stops whining and starts shouting.
“Because my leg was and still is worth your life!” Sawyer snaps when he can’t reach the joint of the next scale. “Of course you’re allowed to feel the same—” His hand slides back to its previous hold. “Oh.”
Sliseag huffs, then extends his left leg, sliding his claw through the mud. Slowly, it lowers to a walkable degree of incline.
My throat tightens as Sawyer lets go and slowly rises. He extends his arms outward, like a cadet on Parapet, then trudges upward step by step as I catch movement in my peripheral vision.
“Your year-mates arrive,” Tairn says.
I keep my eyes locked on Sawyer as he reaches the top of Sliseag’s shoulder and lowers his arms. His next movements look like a routine he’s performed thousands of times, and with a few quick steps, he finds the seat.
Sliseag rises to his full height as Sawyer settles in, and I back away for a better view.
“Looks like you’ve been up there a time or two,” I call to him as he relaxes in the seat.
“Feels like I never left,” he shouts down with a grin. “I can ride.”
“You can ride,” I agree, my smile instant and wide. “Now, does it matter how you got there, or only that he chose you?”
“You know the answer to that already.” His smile softens.
“I do.” I nod, then turn to Andarna, narrowing the pathway to just her. “Look at me.”
She spares me a glance.
“You can grieve.” If my words don’t work, maybe hers will.
Golden eyes lock on mine.
“You can grieve,” I repeat. “And when and if you’re ready to talk about it, I’ll be here.”
“You do not talk about your grief,” she counters. “Neither does he.” Her tail flicks in Tairn’s direction.
She has a point. “I’m getting there,” I say slowly. “And he’s not perfect, either.”
Her nostrils flare and her scales shimmer to the purple-toned black she usually prefers.
I nod and let the subject drop, but it definitely feels like progress.
“Thank Amari,” Rhi whispers as she comes up on my left side, grinning up at Sawyer.
“Sawyer! Look at you!” Ridoc runs forward, his arms up in victory.
Sliseag swings his head and snaps his teeth shut a few feet in front of Ridoc.
“Look at you from a distance!” Ridoc retreats, his arms still held high. When he bumps into Maren, he turns and sweeps her into a hug as she laughs.
“I couldn’t help,” Rhi says quietly as Sawyer focuses on reacquainting himself with the seat. “Did I fail him?”
“No. You were exactly who he needed you to be.” I slip my arm through hers. Fuck, this pack is heavy. “You’re our friend, but you’re also our squad leader. He doesn’t want to fall in front of you; none of us do. We want to make you proud. And I know you’re used to being responsible for us, and you’re truly exceptional at your job…”
Ridoc puts Maren down, then reaches for Cat, who accepts his hug with straight arms and an annoyed eye roll.
“But?” Rhi glances at me sideways.
“But you couldn’t have made this happen any faster.” We walk toward the others. “Not you, or me, or Ridoc, or Jesinia. It was always down to the two of them. It was only ever going to be on their timeline.”
Ridoc spins toward Neve, and the third-year flier looks at him like he’s grown another set of eyeballs as she dodges his embrace and bumps into Bragen. He whirls toward Imogen, who puts up her hand as she walks by with Quinn.
“Don’t even think about it, Gamlyn,” she warns.
“You’re so warm and fuzzy!” Quinn says, slinging her arm around Imogen’s shoulders.
“Only to you.” She looks up at Sawyer. “Nice to see you where you belong, Henrick!”
Ridoc spins and throws his arms around Dain, who lifts his brows, then slowly brings his hand up and pats Ridoc’s back twice in an awkward exchange. “Looking good, Sawyer!” Dain calls up, then continues on toward Cath.
“Good job, Matthias,” Bodhi says to Rhi as he walks by. “Got your cadet back in the seat.”