Total pages in book: 94
Estimated words: 86444 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 432(@200wpm)___ 346(@250wpm)___ 288(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 86444 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 432(@200wpm)___ 346(@250wpm)___ 288(@300wpm)
“You can’t be serious right now.” She looks at me. “You would give your life for that little girl,” she says with anger. “Would you trade places with Cassie?”
“What?” I ask, confused.
“If push comes to shove, would you have traded places with Cassie and leave her with Ari?” she asks the question I have asked myself.
“Without thinking twice,” I answer honestly. “For both of them, I would do it.”
“Then that, my friend, answers all the questions you have had. That is love. It might not seem big to you. It’s no grand gesture, but to give your life for someone, that is love.” She walks around the counter now. I turn and face her as she stands in front of me. “It might not seem like love to you, but it’s love.” She puts her hands on my shoulders, and I just feel her heat seep through my shirt. “Now would you have always stayed with her?” She shrugs. “No one knows the answer to that. Maybe she would have left you, did you ever think of that?”
“No,” I answer. “I never actually thought of that. I only thought of myself and the way I felt.”
“You mean you only thought of ways to shit on yourself?” she says, walking away from me now, but my shoulders still feel her touch on them. “That is what you meant.”
“I’m just sorry,” I say as she walks to the sink and turns the water back on.
“What are you sorry for?” She leans back on the counter, folding her arms over her chest.
“I’m sorry that she died alone. I’m sorry that I didn’t love her like she should have been loved, and I’m sorry she will never be able to see how fucking amazing our child is.”
“So you’re sorry for things that were out of your control?” She stares at me, and I just sit here, letting her words sink in. “You aren’t the one who killed her.” She points to me, and her words hit me in the chest. “You loved her the only way you knew how, and it sucks that she won’t see how Ari is, but I have a feeling she is with her every single step of the way.” She turns to grab the pasta and dumps it in the water. Neither of us says anything as she continues to cook.
“Thank you,” I say softly, and she turns around and looks at me. “For.” I put my hands up in the air and then shake my head. “I don’t even know for what, but thank you for listening.”
“You’re welcome.” She smiles at me. I want to walk over to her and hug her, and I do just that. I get off the stool and walk over to her.
“Are you allowed to hug clients?” I ask her and don’t really wait for her to answer when I bend down and wrap my arms around her tiny waist. She wraps her arms around my shoulders and leans her head against mine. “Thank you,” I whisper and step away from her, but our eyes meet, and we stop moving. Our faces are at the same level with the way I’m bent down. I move her hair away from her face, and my hand finally cups her cheek. My thumb moves back and forth, and I see her chest rising and falling. I can hear my own heart in my chest, beating so fast. My mouth is so dry I don’t even think I can lick my lips. Her lips part when my head moves just a touch closer, and I can taste her right now. I don’t know what the fuck I’m doing, but I do know that I don’t think I’ve ever wanted something more.
“Ralph.” She says my name almost like she’s asking me something or maybe she’s telling me that this is not a good idea. Maybe she is telling me that I should not do this.
“Candace.” I say her name back, and I don’t know what I’m telling her, if anything. “You are always a ten,” I say, smiling and bending just a touch more. “Definitely always a ten.” I’m about to bend a bit more to close the distance between us when I hear Ariella cry. My hand drops from her face, and I step back. I look at her poke her tongue out of her mouth to lick her lips. “I’ll be right back.”
Turning, I walk out of the kitchen and stop when I know she can’t see me. Leaning back against the wall, I wait as my heart slowly starts to calm down. I put my hands over my face, and I smell her now. I had my hand on her for less than a minute, and I smell her all around me. I don’t have time to think of anything else because Ari yells even louder than before. I walk into her room, avoiding looking at the picture of Cassie.