Total pages in book: 91
Estimated words: 90736 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 454(@200wpm)___ 363(@250wpm)___ 302(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 90736 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 454(@200wpm)___ 363(@250wpm)___ 302(@300wpm)
Dex: What does it mean, you “showed” her? Why don’t I like the sound of that? Now I don’t trust you.
Andy: At least I didn’t turn out to be an unemployed freeloader!
Dex: Is that what she thought you were? A freeloader?
Andy: She hadn’t told me so to my face, but I got the feeling the answer is yes, yes she did. Pretty sure she thought that when I got here, I needed to sleep on her couch and not pay rent and eat all her food.
Dex: Dude. You need to sell this story to the press—they would eat this shit up!
Andy: I’m not selling my own story to the press. I’m not desperate for publicity like some people are.
Dex: Did you just imply that I’m desperate for publicity??
Andy: No. But I know you could use more Positive publicity, lol
Dex: Speaking of which, have you told Trent about your little girlfriend?? He’s going to be interested in what you have going on behind his back.
Andy: First of all, I don’t have to tell him every time I take a dump. Some things are my business. But to answer your question, yes, he knows I’m here in GB—I have a meeting with them tomorrow morning.
Dex: So are you actually considering the Packers seriously or no?
Andy: Don’t know yet. I’ll let you know after the meeting what the vibe here is.
Dex: The Vibe?
Andy: Yes, the vibe. Don’t knock it.
Dex: Listen to you! You sound like a new man, talking about vibes and juju and dating regular women.
Andy: I should take offense at that, but I’m too fucking happy.
Andy: Hey, have I mentioned Harlow’s weird little dog?
Dex: I don’t want details about the dog. All I’m saying is, don’t be surprised if your Middle Earth adventure ends up a headline story for the next week.
Andy: Too late. Not that I see why anyone would care about my love life—that is not evening newsworthy. SportsCenter, maybe . . .
Dex: Says the man whose last girlfriend was a supermodel.
Andy: Don’t remind me.
Dex: Man was she pissed when you broke things off. Talk about bitter.
Andy: She’s in the past now. Harlow is the future.
Dex: Wow. You really are drinking the Kool-Aid . . .
Chapter 26
Harlow
“If I had known you were going to bring him out in public, I would have met you at Applebee’s and pretended to bump into you so I could meet him. What the hell, Harlow?”
I’m hiding in the bathroom for another call with my friends—seems Danny’s new obsession is getting updates. When he hadn’t heard from me—because I was out with Andy—he did the one thing a desperate friend does: added us to a video call. So here I am, holed up in the bathroom while Andy lounges in the living room.
He thinks I’m peeing, so I have to make it quick.
“The Applebee’s thing is throwing me off,” Portia quips, seeming distracted while glancing at another device off camera. “I thought he was rich.”
“Why would he take you to a chain and not, like, somewhere nice and private?” Ava has her lips pursed and is perched on her couch, filing her nails at the same time.
I shrug. “I didn’t take him there—it was his choice! I’m still freaking out about the whole thing. If it was me, we wouldn’t have gone anywhere.”
“It must be the queso that did it.” Ava blinks innocently.
“We know you like their queso, Ava. It’s no secret,” I hiss. “Guys, it doesn’t matter where we went to eat. I’m running out of time—he’s in the living room chilling with the dog, and I have a feeling Kevin likes Andy but Andy doesn’t like Kevin.” It is an unrequited love.
“He doesn’t like your dog? What kind of a monster wouldn’t like your dog?” Portia gasps.
“My dog is an asshole. I don’t blame him.” I sigh. “He’s been giving Andy the bombastic side-eye since we got home from dinner, probably because we didn’t bring him a doggy bag. I think he’s jealous that I’m paying more attention to Andy.”
“Can we please stay on task?!” Danny screeches, clapping his hands to regain attention. “You can’t stay on the toilet all night, eventually he’s going to come looking for you.”
I stop talking and cup a hand around my ear, listening for Andy’s footfalls.
When I don’t hear any, I continue my story.
“So, anyway, we’re at Applebee’s, and I could feel people looking at us. He kept trying to act normal, but it was really weird—he had that stupid mustache on that he’d been wearing in New York, as if no one would recognize him?” I laugh at the memory of the black handlebar mustache stuck to his upper lip. “He has the brownest eyes and thick brows. They’re the best part of his face.”
My sigh is long and wistful.
“You should hear yourself.” Danny laughs. “Brown eyes this, and thick eyebrows blah, blah. Gag.”