Total pages in book: 80
Estimated words: 76943 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 385(@200wpm)___ 308(@250wpm)___ 256(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 76943 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 385(@200wpm)___ 308(@250wpm)___ 256(@300wpm)
Humans.
“Have we decided when we qualified as humans?” I ignored the rest of the obvious fun and focused on Pierce. “I remember hearing a discussion about if we’re aliens or not. I know the deputy has decided we’re aliens but I also know not everyone agrees with that.”
I was pretty sure the human locals were debating that too, but I wasn’t going to bring up some of the weird conversations I’d overheard. If the local dragons and mages were happy believing they blended in, I wasn’t going to burst their bubble.
Daddy shrugged. “Some people think it’s still up for debate but we’ve been living here several generations and some of us are even assholes. I think that qualifies us as human. Just human plus.”
“Like an upgrade on your subscription.” Wren was bouncing on his toes and then rocking back down on his heels. “I think that’s a good way to describe it. I’m an upgrade. We have to tell the men at the diner we’ve figured it out.”
That was going to be fun…but I couldn’t decide if I wanted to see the original discussion or watch for the fallout.
“I feel special.” I ignored the way Wren’s Daddy was trying to decide if we were cute crazy or strange crazy, but since he was trying not to smile, I decided it didn’t matter. “I’m human plus.”
I didn’t feel like an alien, so that might’ve been what counted.
It was enough that I decided I wasn’t going to debate it anymore either. So I turned back to Wren and focused on the fun part of the conversation. “I heard you were a very cute squirrel. Was it a game or are you a squirrel and a little?”
Wren’s Daddy was just blinking and seemed to be back to the cute or crazy mental debate, but he was watching his boy like Wren was the most fascinating thing he’d ever seen, so I liked him. Wren, on the other hand, shrugged as he bounced again. “Mostly pretend. I like to talk. Squirrels don’t get to talk enough. The men at the diner are debating which is better but squirrels get to wiggle more. But since I’m just a squirrel sometimes when I’m little, I’m counting it as playing pretend. The pups are pups a lot and I’m just having fun.”
“That’s a good way to explain it but I’m sure the diner men are going to have questions.” Oh, the diner. I glanced around between everyone. “Um, I’m pretty sure there are some hospitality spells built into the foundation of the building. I’m not going to be able to figure out the specific ones with everyone in there.”
Too many shenanigans and just talking in general made it difficult for a variety of reasons.
“They’re all too distracting.” The understatement made everyone chuckle, even Wren’s Daddy. “But I’m confident that there are spells that make you want to relax and stay longer. Those types also generally make you want to share and talk more too.”
The rest of the spells being tossed around were ridiculous things from the other patrons, like the teenage boys in the corner who’d been trying to poison each other. Those spells had been mild and at most they’d have spent entirely too much time in the bathroom, but one good glare and mouthing the word red had stopped the nonsense.
Wren sighed and Daddy just rolled his eyes. Wren’s Daddy nodded like it wasn’t a surprise, so he might’ve already noticed at least some of the chaos. “So…yeah…the locals are nosy and slightly insane but the diner isn’t helping the situation.”
“At least it’s making everyone’s opinions on going through the portal clear.” Wren seemed to naturally find the bright side in any situation. “I like not having to guess what they’re thinking. It’s going to make going through the portal a lot less stressful. I don’t like it when I have to worry about what people are thinking.”
Oh.
Daddy’s eyes widened and he seemed to reset like a computer doing the whirly thing. Wren was patient and his Daddy just stood there watching Pierce reset. After a few seconds, Pierce took a deep breath and his computer was up and running again. “Meeting his relatives is important. You don’t want to make a bad impression, though, so I’m going to suggest asking questions about local customs and social norms.”
He was so cute.
Wren’s Daddy frowned, though. “He doesn’t have to change who he is for anyone. I have learned that human social custom very quickly.”
Well, at least he hadn’t picked up any bad habits from us yet?
“I don’t mind learning the rules.” Wren wiggled and bounced up on his toes to kiss his Daddy’s cheek. “It’ll be fine. Like a game or playing pretend. I can be boring if I need to.”
Wren’s Daddy didn’t seem to know what to say but Pierce did. “Games are fun but just make sure to have private time to be yourself. Are…are you going to be able to bring some toys?”