Total pages in book: 196
Estimated words: 180438 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 902(@200wpm)___ 722(@250wpm)___ 601(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 180438 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 902(@200wpm)___ 722(@250wpm)___ 601(@300wpm)
As the days wind down and we get back into routine, the fallout has been hitting him especially hard. Throughout our conversations in bed at night, he’s coming to realize just how close he came to losing everything.
I have been having fun comparing him to the dog with the bone who lost what he had to grab at nothing. Some days, I have to hold him back from going after any and everyone he could get his hands on and remind him that he was as much to blame for what happened as they were. It was the only way I could see to keep him from making the same mistake again, by accepting his part of the blame.
That was the personal part of things, but there was now this other darker side that I was coming to learn more about than I ever wanted to.
I still don’t know all of what went down with the whole trafficking thing associated with his concerts, and I get the feeling that he’s keeping things from me, but I’m satisfied with the fact that he wasn’t part of it. I couldn’t be with him if he was.
I’m still reeling from the knowledge, and though the leaks didn’t touch on that aspect of things, all I know has come from him, and like I’ve said, he’s holding back, but I have to ask myself if I really want to go swimming in those waters. Sometimes, the less you know, the better.
As long as this concert can help in any way to get those poor souls back to where they belong, I’d do one a week for the rest of my life if that’s what it takes. All things considered, I think Mary got off easy after all that she’d done. The revelations about what she’d done to her own daughters, all for the sake of making it big, were a whole other story.
I always knew there was something just a little bit off about that whole family, but this was a bit much, even for my imagination. Now, I can’t help but feel some pity for them. It can’t have been easy to be raised by a monster.
On the other hand, if they knew and took part in it, which the rumors seem to point to, that pity goes only so far. It’s the same with Janie. I can have compassion for her because of the way she was used, but at what point does she take responsibility for her own part in it?
She’s the one who wanted him at all costs. And what about the hell she’d turned my life into after the fact? She didn’t have to go as far as she did after she’d won. So any pity I may feel for her could be misplaced, and she’s probably somewhere getting her just desserts if MengeLiNi still had her in her clutches.
***
*Janie*
“What now?” When had I fallen asleep? I woke sometime in the dark to find her standing over me.
“I’m leaving.”
“Good riddance.” Why should I be afraid that she’s leaving me here alone? This is my home, after all, the place where I’d grown up, and she had no right to be here.
But somehow, I felt a pang of fear rush through me at being left on my own. My life is a mess right now, and as much as I detest her and this situation, at least she was another warm body to keep me company. “Well, bye!”
She said she was leaving, but she was just standing there with this look of anger and hatred on her face that I didn’t understand. I thought we’d already been through the whole high school bullshit that first day and moved on, so what was that look about?
“You really are a subpar human, aren’t you? How did someone who had everything turn out like you? What the hell is broken in you?”
“What the hell are you talking about now?” Did I do something before I passed out? I couldn’t remember, and it hurt to think too hard.
I felt even worse than before and was in no mood to deal with her nonsense right now. I could go for a shot of vodka if nothing else, but there was nothing like that in the house, and I was reminded that I had no money. That sobering thought was enough to help me sit up without toppling over.
“You knew they were trafficking girls, and you said nothing.”
“I had no part in that….wait, how do you know about that?” Was I talking in my sleep? What the hell happened before I fell asleep? Try as I might, I could not recall having that conversation with her.
“The message you sent Elena, that girl is my sister, and the only reason I’m not breaking your neck right now is that, in a roundabout way, you’ve given me what I need to find her, but trust me, if it wasn’t for the fact that she’s going to need me once she’s free I would kill you and bury you in the backyard.”