Total pages in book: 196
Estimated words: 180438 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 902(@200wpm)___ 722(@250wpm)___ 601(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 180438 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 902(@200wpm)___ 722(@250wpm)___ 601(@300wpm)
This was new to me since everyone else in the past had forced me to do anything but. His faith, his trust in me, did something to me, something I didn’t even know I needed. The conference had come off more real than anything else I’d done in the past because it wasn’t scripted.
No one fed me what to say; it was organic and real, and I think that came across to the audience. I was starting to feel like the man I always wanted to be, not only in my personal life but in my profession as well.
It sucks that we’d had to go through all that we had to get here, but at least I had my girl back. No matter what comes from here on out, I can take it, just as long as she’s by my side.
I know my little stunt is going to bring the heat for both of us, but this, to me, was the only way. The only other option was to trickle truth the public, and that would take about a year to get everything cleared up. Plus, I have the added bonus of lifting a very heavy weight off my shoulders.
I didn’t sugarcoat anything; I just laid bare everything from beginning to end, not hiding my own faults and throwing others under the bus that deserved to be there. Now, the ball is in the public’s court for them to do with as they please. Now the idea of a concert doesn’t seem so bad, if not for the dark reasons behind it.
I wasn’t given all the details in that one call, but I’m sure I’ll be hearing from Lyon soon enough. I can’t forget my part in this, and even though I had no idea my venues were being used for such disgusting purposes, in this way, I can do my part to right the wrongs that had been done in my name if such a thing is even possible.
“Where did you go? You sure you’re not keeping anything from me?” I’d spaced out in front of her, now with a smile, tried to calm her fears. I agree with the guys; this is not something I want her to be a part of. And as much as I’d promised myself not to keep anything from her again, lest I repeat the same mistakes I made in the past, this is just one of those things that I’d prefer to keep her in the dark about.
The way she was looking at me with that hint of suspicion, I knew she wouldn’t stop until she got some answers and there’s only one way I know to keep her off the scent.
She squealed with delight when I picked her up and spun her around in my arms before throwing her over my shoulder and taking her down the hallway to our bed.
Chapter 96
*Janie*
I’m not going to make it. The pain is too intense, and the thoughts running rampant through my head aren’t helping. I need to get out there and do something, call someone, but there was no one. I never knew how lonely and sad my life was until now. Who would’ve imagined just a few short weeks ago that my life would come to this? I certainly didn’t.
I had everything so well thought out before; there was no way for me to fail, at least that’s what my parents had assured me of, along with that dumb witch or whatever the hell she was. I’d put all my hopes and dreams in them and believed them when they told me it was a sure thing.
Now, none of these people are here to hold my hand. In all fairness, I can’t really blame my mother. The little bitch had threatened us both if she ever crossed this door and Mary and Scott were gone. Those two would be the only ones I could remotely trust to turn this thing around in my favor; they’d done it before.
Every time Ryder had started slipping out of my grasp, one or the other of them would find a way to rein him back in, but now there was no hope. I should’ve paid closer attention. It was easier in the beginning. Back then, I had the adoration of his fans and the pain and suffering of that Elena bitch to keep me warm.
I didn’t know then that the novelty would wear off and that I would become trapped in a web of my own making. My only purpose in the beginning was to keep Ryder away from her, to have him for myself. After the wedding I stupidly believed that with the hard part out of the way, things would be smooth sailing from there on out.
But how was I to know that the loneliness of living with a man who outwardly hated me on his better days and wished me dead on his worst would get to me? Because of that loneliness I’d sought validation and comfort in the arms of someone else. I’d felt safe taking my eyes off of him because he spent his days wallowing in the past, high off his ass from sunup ‘til sundown.