Total pages in book: 41
Estimated words: 38738 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 194(@200wpm)___ 155(@250wpm)___ 129(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 38738 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 194(@200wpm)___ 155(@250wpm)___ 129(@300wpm)
In clothes he was gorgeous, out of them he was like a completely different specimen. I couldn’t compare him to anyone else. Not even a celebrity came to mind.
I rolled my lips together to smother a groan and pulled my knees up, resting my arms on them as I stared across the room, shivering from the chill in the air.
I couldn’t believe I was here in this bed with an oath marking my flesh. No one would understand how significant this was unless they lived the lives we did. The reasoning for it, however, was deeply upsetting. Ciaran had said it best earlier.
I came from a world of dark secrets, yet I had never realized so many were being kept from me.
Until now.
I felt like my entire life was a fucking joke. My heart hurt when I thought of my siblings and Abuelo. Were we not close enough for them to warn me?
There was a heaviness in my chest that made me want to dig inside myself and remove the things that made me feel too much.
My parents…I hated them, but a part of me still loved them too. I hated that more.
I didn’t know if they were selfish and cruel or if I was too weak for allowing anyone into the small space that I reserved for those I loved.
My eyes burned with unshed tears I quickly extinguished with the heel of my hands. I wouldn’t sit around crying or torturing myself with self-pity. That would be beneficial for no one.
A feather-light touch pulled me from my thoughts as Ciaran ran his fingers down my spine. I looked over at him thankful we were in the dark. He wouldn’t have seen my disconcertion.
“It’s always hard to accept,” he mused quietly. His hand fell away as he moved into a sitting position, bracing his back against the remaining pillows that lined the headboard. We’d knocked the rest onto his bedroom floor.
“What’s hard?” I asked softly.
“Everything that comes with being an heir to families like ours. We’re born to slaughter and accumulate power.”
I slightly puckered my lips, turning that over in my head. I’d only known about the latter part. Power begot power, or whatever my father liked to say. He left out a few important pieces of information during that speech.
Ciaran remained quiet for a minute as if considering his next words. “The game is designed to strip away your humanity. For those watching it’s a source of entertainment. The same concept doesn’t apply to those who are forced into it.
“You weren’t supposed to be in that category. Neither was my brother for entirely different reasons. He should have never gotten involved in this part of our world at all.”
I slid back on the bed and positioned myself beside him, tucking the blanket beneath my arms. “Was it hard for you to accept?”
“I was raised to embrace the darkest parts of myself and our society,” he laughed lightly and added, “I enjoy it too much.”
I grinned with a breathy laugh. “Hm, why am I not surprised?”
“It can get tedious. I’ve been doing it for so long that there’s hardly any excitement anymore.”
“So, you’re into murder and politics. Our missing siblings aside, this conversation probably should have happened before I wound up in your bed.”
“You were going to end up in my bed because I wanted you here and I do whatever is necessary to get what I want.”
I blew out a scoff.
“You don’t think so?” he questioned with genial curiosity.
“Ciaran, honestly? No. I think it would have been unacted upon desire we’d be forced to bury when our parents told us who we had to marry.”
His brisk laugh had a scowl furrowing my brow.
“My parents didn’t dictate who I would be with. I expected them too, was prepared for it. And then I met you. Yours like to think they can control that decision still, but I never would’ve let that happen.”
Denial came quick and steadfast. He was making it sound as if me being his was never a question, but a guarantee. I recalled his words at the party, that it was inevitable.
I hadn’t jumped ahead of myself and started planning a future with him. He reached over and took the hand with the lines of our oath into his. “It worked out that you wanted me too. Otherwise, I would’ve had to make you eventually feel the same after I took what was mine.”
My brows rose and my head swiveled in his direction. His sinister omissions were always worded as factual. He wouldn’t settle for less even if what he wanted wasn’t meant to be his. I didn’t entirely dislike this side of him. It gave me an odd sense of belonging.
He brought my palm to his mouth and kissed it gently. “You feel a little better now?”
“Do I…? What do you mean?”