Total pages in book: 176
Estimated words: 167257 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 836(@200wpm)___ 669(@250wpm)___ 558(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 167257 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 836(@200wpm)___ 669(@250wpm)___ 558(@300wpm)
“How noble of you.” Atlas sneered. “You want to know what I really think? I think it’s rich of you to say that Joren doesn’t love his wife when you don’t know what love is. You’re not capable of it, and I wish I’d never met you.”
My nostrils flared as I stared straight ahead, pretending her words hadn’t cut me deep. I knew she was angry, hurt, and just lashing out, but it didn’t hurt any less. My voice was hollow when I finally spoke. “That may be, but this changes nothing between us, Atlas.”
“If you say so. Look, I gotta go.” Atlas quickly gathered her things, but when she reached for the door, I quickly hit the locks. Without looking back at me, she said, “Unlock the door, Rowdy.”
“Chill with that Rowdy shit,” I said with a snarl. Atlas said nothing, so I sighed. “Tell me you understand what I said.”
“I wish I could, Owen, but it’s not that simple anymore. It’s too much. It’s all too much. I knew you were a monster, but I fell in love with you anyway, the good, the bad, and the ugly. There was no part of you I didn’t want. But for the first time since I said yes to us in that hot-air balloon, I’m wondering if I ever really knew you.”
I sucked in a breath and felt the heart I’d kept on ice for her give its final death rattle. I felt her gaze on me, but I didn’t allow myself to look at her. I was afraid of what she’d see if I did. She might be having regrets about us, but I wasn’t. “Aight.” It was all I said before I hit the locks. “You’re free.”
I saw her flinch from the corner of my eye, but she didn’t stick around to question what I meant. She wouldn’t like the answer either way.
Atlas fled, and I didn’t let myself watch her go. I wasn’t sure how long I sat there before I found the will to leave.
I’d never broken a heart before, so I didn’t know the signs to look for. Sign or no sign, I was pretty sure I’d broken Rowdy’s. It should have been easy to detect since I’ve suffered it before, but heartbreak looked different in every person. Some ran from it while some wallowed in it.
And then there was Rowdy. He just pretended it never happened.
I was still living with him, but it had been a week since we’d said more than two words to each other.
It felt like we were going backward—tiptoeing around each other, sleeping in separate rooms, and being careful not to touch or let a look linger for too long.
I should have been relieved when the kit arrived in the mail, but nothing but dread filled my stomach as I stared at the multiple mouth swabs laid out before me.
None of the labs I’d called could see us before the end of the year, so I booked an appointment with the earliest availability.
Next fucking year.
In the meantime, I had the lab send us an at-home kit, and they swore that as long as we followed the directions, the results would be accurate. It was our next best option since we didn’t need them to be admissible in court.
It would still take a few weeks to get answers. Every lab in the country was not only backlogged but understaffed thanks to the pandemic.
Hard to believe my sex life wasn’t a priority.
I was home alone in the living room with my textbooks and notes spread all around me on the coffee table while I studied for my midterms. At the moment, I was struggling with the practice tests for my Intro to Psych II course, and Professor Saunders wasn’t responding to any of my emails. She hadn’t been in weeks.
Meanwhile, Rowdy was…out.
I hadn’t seen him since this morning.
Since I was back in school full-time, I was only working part-time at the shop, so I didn’t get to see him as much as I used to, and the rare times we were both home, we didn’t talk.
When I entered a room, he left it. When I tried to talk, he ignored me.
How the hell had this turned on me?
Rowdy might have fucked Jada before my time, but it was still a hard pill to swallow. He still lied about it by trying to cover it up. He still betrayed his best friend. I knew firsthand how much that hurt.
Rowdy had listened to me cry over what Sutton and Sienna had done to me while pretending to understand when he was really no better.
How could I trust him now?
The doorbell rang, and I practically raced to it since I was getting nowhere with my studies. I ripped the door open without checking the peep hole and almost slammed it back when I saw who was standing on my porch.