Total pages in book: 76
Estimated words: 73094 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 365(@200wpm)___ 292(@250wpm)___ 244(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 73094 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 365(@200wpm)___ 292(@250wpm)___ 244(@300wpm)
He reached over again, resting his hand on my thigh. He stroked it a few times, then brought his hand up to my face, moving his thumb along my jaw.
We didn’t talk for a minute. My memories receded like waves, and in the stillness of the car, suddenly all I saw was Jesse’s striking beauty. The masculine cut of his jaw next to the soft, plush curve of his lips. The way his lashes shaded the constant glow of his eyes.
“Forgot how good you look,” I finally said.
After a moment, his lips moved into a rare, bashful smile.
“I fucking hated not being able to see you while you were gone,” he said, running his fingers through his hair.
“You knew you’d see me again.”
He gave me a comical glare. “Did I? You bolted from my frat house like you were a mouse who saw a snake.”
“I did see a snake. A big, scary snake in my future, which is the idea of how Kane is going to strike me down like a viper if he finds out we fucked. And also, I just…”
I trailed off, looking out the window as a truck drove by. The driver gave us a little wave, rolled down his window to check that our car hadn’t broken down, then went along his way.
“What were you saying?” Jesse asked. “You were worried about Kane that night, but what else?”
I swallowed hard. “Do you ever want something for so long that when you finally get it, you feel like it can’t be real? Like you’re not prepared, somehow?”
Jesse chewed on his lower lip, pondering it for a moment. “You know what? No. Fuck that.”
I raised an eyebrow. “No?”
“If I want something that bad, I relish every moment of it,” he said confidently. “Every time I win a game. Or when TNU accepted me, and I found out I’d gotten a hockey scholarship. Or even the freedom I finally felt when I left Elliot. I’m not going to stop and question these things. I’m going to grab ‘em by the reins and fucking ride.”
I groaned. “God, you sound hot and you compared it to riding? You’re too good, Jesse.”
He watched me. “If you want something that badly, Mason, then it’s worth doing. They say courage is doing something even if you’re scared, right?”
I shifted on the passenger seat. “I’m usually not afraid of anything.”
He flashed me a smile that made my stomach drop. “Then come to the Hard Spot with me. On a date.”
“Can’t do that.”
“Yes you fucking can.”
The dam inside me creaked, heaved, and finally all-out broke.
I wanted to protest and yell and fucking tell him no until I was blue in the face.
But unfortunately, I knew he was right.
And the flood of emotion inside me was never going to be able to be ignored again.
I leaned over and caught his lips in a kiss. He opened to me right away, pulling me in and telling me without words exactly how much he wanted me. He bit down on my lower lip, sucking at it and moving in closer to me, covering me with his warmth.
I’d be stupid to ever give it up. I was stupid to go without it, even for a couple of weeks.
Nothing was easy, but when I was with Jesse, I didn’t feel like I was searching, anymore.
I felt like I’d finally found someone.
Even if it was in the form of a college hockey player with enough attitude to fill an arena. Someone I never could have pictured myself wanting. Completely unexpected, but exactly what I needed.
“I really did want you in my bed that night, by the way,” Jesse murmured against my skin, kissing all along my jaw. “But it’s okay that you didn’t want to sleep over.”
“I wanted to,” I breathed. “So badly.”
“You really did?”
I swallowed, nodding at him. “It was all fear, Jesse. I wanted to be there with you.”
He gave me one last slow, firm kiss before pulling in a breath and leaning back toward the driver’s seat.
“Well. Thanks for going on a date with me,” he said.
I still felt like I was signing up for a suicide mission as Jesse put his seatbelt back on and drove back out onto the road. We headed to the Hard Spot, his hand resting on my thigh the whole time.
But Jesse had reached out and found me this afternoon. He’d done it more than once, now, when I’d needed it the most. I was known to do dumb things when hot guys asked me to do them, and maybe this would be no different.
Or maybe it was the first good thing I’d done in my life since everything had changed.
16
JESSE
“Wait a minute. You guys are fucking, aren’t you?”
I coughed on my sip of beer. I turned to Mason, who was sitting in the bar stool next to mine with his cheeks rapidly turning beet red. We’d only been sitting in the Hard Spot for five minutes, and I was just starting to get comfortable on the bar stools with the ambient sound of the bar music and chatter all around us.