Total pages in book: 80
Estimated words: 80102 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 401(@200wpm)___ 320(@250wpm)___ 267(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 80102 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 401(@200wpm)___ 320(@250wpm)___ 267(@300wpm)
I’m about to take my seat when he meets me there and surprises the shit out of me by leaning in and kissing my cheek.
“Hi,” he says like it’s a completely normal greeting we’ve had a thousand times over.
“Uh, hey …”
He rounds the bar, putting his tray back in place, and then serves the person waiting for his attention. He looks like Rainn, he’s acting like Rainn, but when he glances at me, he doesn’t seem like the Rainn I’ve come to know. He looks … happy.
He passes me a cider with a wink.
“Did you win the lottery or something?” I ask.
“What? Why?”
“You’re … chipper. It’s freaky.”
Rainn laughs.
“Stop that. Stop that right now, you pod person.”
“Are you sure you’re not the pod person? You make me laugh all the time.”
“Yes, but usually because I’ve done something funny. You’re smiling for no reason. Stop being creepy.”
His smile doesn’t drop. “I told my cousin yesterday.”
“Told your cousin what? That her taste in cars is crappy and how she expects two guys our size to fit in it, you’ll never know?”
“No. About us.”
Oh. Okay, I was not expecting that. “Umm, how did she take it?”
“She was surprised, but apparently she knows your brother and Christie, so she approves.”
I take a sip of my drink while I try to process that.
“I’ll be right back,” he says and serves more customers.
He told his cousin. Technically, he came out even if he doesn’t like that phrasing. That’s … amazing and crazy and … shit, why does that feel kind of pressure-y?
Someone takes the barstool beside mine, and before I can turn to look at them, they’re in my personal space.
“Uh, did I see the straight bartender kiss your cheek?”
I turn toward Ian with a smile. “You did.”
Instead of looking, I don’t know, impressed, he looks like I told him my dog died.
“Oh, honey, you didn’t, did you?”
“Didn’t what?”
“Sleep with the straight guy.”
“How straight can he really be if I slept with him? Which I’m not saying happened, but—”
“Bad move.” Ian glances over at Rainn, who’s serving a customer at the other end of the bar. “Most ‘straight’ guys who say they’re ‘straight’ and then suck dick are still ‘straight’ when it all comes down to it.”
My heart sinks at the thought Rainn could possibly be like that, but I shrug it off and choose not to entertain the thought. Rainn might still be working things out, but he can do that in his own time. I’m not going to make him choose a label when he’s not ready, and it’s way too soon.
“He’s allowed to identify however he identifies,” I say.
“I agree, but at the expense of someone else’s feelings? That’s when the lines get blurred for me.”
“Not everyone likes labels,” I argue.
“Mm-hmm. He’s probably totally cool with a straight label, though.”
“He already came out to his cousin. He just kissed my cheek in public.”
“In a queer-friendly space.”
I want to argue he kissed me in the car outside my family’s home yesterday morning too, but he’d probably argue, “Where people weren’t likely to see you.”
Ian’s eyes soften in sympathy. “Just … watch for the warning signs.”
“What warning signs?”
Ian holds up a finger. “Not defining what you’re actually doing,” he says. Guilty.
Another finger goes up. “Calling it an experiment.”
I want to say, Ha! He doesn’t call it that, but Ian keeps going.
Third finger. “He’ll let you suck his dick and won’t try to reciprocate.”
Boom. Rainn has already reciprocated.
“Won’t take you out in public or show affection in front of your friends.”
He held my hand in front of my family, so I think I’m good there.
One out of four warning signs is not … horrible. Right?
“When he ‘came out’ to his cousin, did he actually say he’s bisexual?” Ian asks.
I don’t know. “Yes.”
“Are you sure?”
I throw my arms up. “What’s the difference?”
“There’s a big difference between admitting you belong to this community and saying you’re dipping your toes in just to get your rocks off.”
I grit my teeth. “Rainn’s not like that.”
“Like what?” Rainn’s voice makes me jump.
He stands in front of us, and I wonder how much he heard.
“Nothing,” Ian and I say at the same time.
Rainn frowns.
Umm … how do I word this? “Ian here is reading way too much into the kiss on the cheek you gave me.”
“Ah.” Rainn stares at my face as if trying to read me.
I’m not sure what he sees, but it must not be good. I don’t want him to think I was complaining about what we have.
“Okay, then.” Rainn rounds the bar, and Ian and I turn on our stools to greet him. He walks right up to me, plants his hands on my thighs, and spreads my legs so he can stand between them.
“What are you doing?” I manage to ask even though my heart is in my throat.