Total pages in book: 76
Estimated words: 76205 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 381(@200wpm)___ 305(@250wpm)___ 254(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 76205 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 381(@200wpm)___ 305(@250wpm)___ 254(@300wpm)
I shake my head, shoving my fingers through my hair. “No. That’s not it. That’s not what I mean.”
“Then what do you mean?”
“I mean… I don’t fucking know. So much resentment has been tied up with your family for so long. It’s not an easy thing to just let it go.”
“I know.” She touches my cheek.
God, I burn at her caress.
“Donny was the most difficult for you, but you got through that.”
“Doesn’t mean I still don’t feel things.”
“Of course you feel things. You’ve built up that resentment since you were eighteen.”
“Younger than that,” I admit. “It’s hard to watch someone be as good as you when you know you’ve worked twice as hard.”
She crosses her arms. “Now that’s not fair. Donny worked as hard as anyone else on the football team. You know that.”
I pull at my hair. “Damn it, that’s not even what I mean. Your brother was an A-plus athlete, but so was I.”
She pulls me to the bed, sits down, and pats the place beside her. “I think there’s something you need to know about Donny.”
“Trust me. I know all I need to know. I know he loves my sister. I believe it. I see the way he looks at her.” I sigh. “It’s the way I look at you, Brianna.”
“Then let go of your resentment toward my family,” she says. “Please. For me.”
“I thought I had.”
She kisses my shoulder. “Letting it go doesn’t mean you turn it off like a faucet. Things will still creep up on you. That’s the nature of harboring those feelings for so long.”
“That sounds like it came straight from—”
“Aunt Melanie?” She laughs. “That’s because it did.”
“I was going to say a therapy session, but same difference.”
“So accept that it’ll still bug you from time to time, but recognize it for what it is, and tell yourself each time that you’ll let it go. That it doesn’t matter. Life isn’t always fair, but that’s not important. What’s important is how you deal with that fairness or unfairness.”
I can’t help a smile then as I caress her soft hair. “Did you ever think of going into psychiatry?”
She laughs. “Are you kidding me? This cowgirl? I can’t think of something that’s more difficult to understand than the human psyche. I prefer my trees in the orchard. My horses in the barn.”
“I’d say you have a knack for helping people.”
She shakes her head. “I just repeat what I’ve heard Aunt Mel say since the day I could understand words. She’s so brilliant. But she doesn’t need me to be her protégé. That’s Angie.”
“Dave’s sister?”
She clamps her hand over her mouth. “Shit. She told me that in confidence. She hasn’t told her parents yet. Just Aunt Melanie and me.”
“You certainly don’t need to worry about me blabbing it,” I say. “I doubt I’ll say two words to Dave while he’s here.”
She swats me in the arm. “Oh yes, you will. We’re all going to get along splendidly like one big happy family. Because, Jesse, we are family. Or we will be soon, whenever my brother and cousin get around to setting a date.”
I can’t help another laugh. “You sound just like Callie.”
“Great.” She rolls her eyes. “I don’t want you thinking of me as your sister.”
“Trust me,” I say, narrowing my gaze. “I don’t. But she gave both Donny and me that same speech about family and all the other bullshit. Even made us shake hands. I’m surprised she didn’t make us hug.”
“Maybe she should have. We Steels tend to be huggers. Except for Dale. He avoids touching people.”
I pause a moment. “Why do you suppose that is?”
She twists her lips and looks away from me.
There’s something you should know about Donny.
Her earlier words.
Donny and Dale were both adopted by the Steels when they were seven and ten, respectively. No one knows about their earlier lives.
Funny how I never considered that before. I was so hell-bent on envying and resenting the Steels for their good fortune, I never stopped to think that appearances can be deceiving.
“Fuck.” I rub at my temples. “It’s bad, isn’t it?”
“It’s not really my story to tell. I didn’t even know about any of it until recently.” She sighs. “But yeah, it’s bad. I’ll tell you if you’d like me to.”
Fuck. All that rivalry with Donny Steel over him being chosen MVP over me, the quarterback. What happened to him and his brother? Abuse, most likely. Or neglect. Enough for the courts to terminate parental rights. Or maybe they were orphans, left alone by a tragic death of their parents.
“I’m sorry. Don’t tell me. Not unless they say it’s okay.”
She nods. “It’s probably better that way. It’s in the past, and as you can see, both Dale and Donny are thriving now, thanks to our parents and the rest of the family. Aunt Mel especially. She got them through that first year, along with a child psychologist in Denver.”