Total pages in book: 200
Estimated words: 189930 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 950(@200wpm)___ 760(@250wpm)___ 633(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 189930 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 950(@200wpm)___ 760(@250wpm)___ 633(@300wpm)
But I was no longer the Maiden in mine.
I couldn’t go back to that life.
A brief burst of fear pierced my chest, but that was okay because a surge of determination quickly doused it like water does flames.
I wouldn’t go back to that life of no rights, of hiding my gift and being unable to help people, of allowing others to do whatever they wanted with me and to me because I had no choice or was constantly put in a position where I had to accept whatever was done out of fear for someone else. Because even though I knew the Queen would never treat me poorly, I would still be expected to hide my gift, to be quiet and unseen, amicable, and appeasing. Every single one of those things went against the very core of my nature.
I couldn’t Ascend.
And that meant there were two options ahead of me. I either attempted to disappear and hid—living behind the veil for so long would be a benefit here since so few people knew what I looked like. However, there were enough that could give a description. I was sure that every city and town would be notified to keep an eye out for me, but I knew how to remain unseen.
But where would I go? How would I survive? And what would happen to Hawke if I disappeared while he was supposed to be escorting me?
I didn’t assume that my now very unknown, uncertain future included Hawke. However, my chest still fluttered. What we’d shared last night had to mean something more than simply seeking physical gratification. He could find that anywhere, but he had chosen me.
And I chose him.
That had to mean something that went beyond last night—something that I never thought I’d get the chance to experience.
Whether or not Hawke was a part of my life or not, the only other option was to go to the Queen and be honest. Now that scared me because I…I didn’t want to disappoint her. But she had to understand. She had with my mother, and I was the Queen’s favorite. She had to understand that I couldn’t be this. And if she didn’t, I needed to make her.
Sitting up, I kept the blanket wrapped around me.
I knew what I couldn’t do, but I didn’t know what that meant in the long-term for the kingdom or for me. The sky outside the window started to lighten. I would talk to Hawke about it, and I wouldn’t wait. He needed to know, and I wanted to know what he thought.
What he’d say.
Knowing that dawn was fast approaching, I rose and got ready, using the remaining water to quickly wash up. The water was cold, but since I had no idea when we’d have access to clean water again, I wasn’t complaining. Relieved to be wearing clean clothes, I strapped the dagger to my thigh. I was just finishing braiding my hair when the knock came.
Figuring Hawke would’ve just come in, I approached with caution. “Yes?”
“It’s Phillips,” came the familiar voice.
I opened the door, and he rushed in, forcing me back as he closed the door behind him. He turned, his cloak parting to reveal his hand on the hilt of his sword.
Warning bells went off as I took a step back.
“Are you alone?” he demanded, his gaze going to the bathing room.
“Yes.” My heart kicked up. “Has something happened?”
He turned back to me, his eyes wide. “Where is Hawke?”
“I…I don’t know. What’s going on?”
“Something about this place isn’t right.”
My brows lifted.
“Things haven’t been right about this whole damn thing. Should’ve listened to my instincts. They’ve kept me alive this whole time, but I didn’t listen this time,” he rattled on as he went to where a small saddlebag was placed. “I did some looking around here. Didn’t see one single Ascended. And Lord Halverston? Seen no evidence of the Royal.”
“I was told he’s hunting with his men,” I assured him. “I asked Magda where he was yesterday.”
My bag in hand, he faced me, his dark brows arched. “What Ascended do you know that would go hunting?”
“I don’t know any that would, but we don’t know every Ascended.”
“You know who we don’t know? This Kieran fellow.” He stopped in front of me. “We know nothing about him.”
Confused by where he was going with all of this, I shook my head. “I don’t know any of you.”
Except for Hawke. Him, I knew.
“You’re not understanding what I’m saying. I’ve never seen Kieran. Not until the morning he showed up at the Rise. Couldn’t get anything from him other than that he worked in the capital. Everything else was short, vague answers.”
I recalled how I’d seen them speaking often throughout the trip. Still, Kieran’s unwillingness to answer questions from a stranger meant nothing. “A lot of guards are on the Rise. Do you know everyone?”