Total pages in book: 70
Estimated words: 67975 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 340(@200wpm)___ 272(@250wpm)___ 227(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 67975 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 340(@200wpm)___ 272(@250wpm)___ 227(@300wpm)
She's sitting on the sofa, her legs crossed, her clothes covered in sweat, her hair down and damp around her shoulders. She looks terrible, and it's so hard for me not to rush over and try to fix that, but there's nothing I can do for her right now. She won't let me in, and I just need her to see I'm going to be there for her, no matter what.
"I'm not hungry," she tells me.
"Maybe not right now, but you might be later."
I glance down at the platter of sandwiches, fruit, and some yogurt that I've laid out for her. I don't know if she's going to eat it, but it's there if she needs it. I've also put down a heap of fresh water because the doctor said the more water she can drink, the quicker it'll leave her system. She's not helping me out with that, but I'm not going to give up on her. Not now, not ever.
"Can you just get out of my fucking room. I want nothing to do with you."
Her voice is a low whip, like even speaking hurts.
She's not going to be easy to get around, but I'm strong-willed and can handle her insults. I sit down on the edge of the bed and just start talking. One way or another, she's going to learn about the world she came from, even if she doesn't like it.
"You would have loved Magnolia," I say. "She was younger than us, but she was a ray of light. She was so bubbly and happy. If you could ask for a sister, it would be her."
"I didn't ask for a god damned sister. I don't want any of this."
"This one time," I go on, laughing to myself, "she punched a boy in the face because he said something about me behind my back. She was so much smaller than him, but it didn't stop her. She raised a fist and just punched him as hard as she could. Her hand was bruised for days, but she walked around like she owned the place."
"I don't care about Magnolia or you or your stupid fucking mother. She gave me up, remember? She handed me over like trash."
"She would never hand you over like trash. If you gave five minutes to find out why she did what she did and what it cost her trying to find you, you'd probably appreciate it a little more."
"She didn't even try to keep me!"
I shake my head. "Did you know what kind of man your father was? A dangerous one. She did what I would call giving you the ultimate sacrifice. She gave you a good family. She gave you to someone who she knew could love you. It was that or spend your life with a terrible father who would have made your life a misery."
"In case you missed it, my life was a fucking misery."
She's talking, even if she's angry about it. I'm not going to argue that one. As long as she's getting it out, I don't care how she does it. Talking is essential, her therapist said it was the most important thing she could do, even if it's laced with anger.
"I'm sure all of it wasn't a misery, Cova. I'm sure before you lost your adoptive parents, that they loved you and cared for you."
Her eyes glaze over, she looks away, and for a moment, I can see something in her. A longing, hurt, pain. So much of it tucked away beneath the surface. It kills me to know she's suffering so badly.
"Tell me something good about them..."
She looks back to me, and for a moment, I think she might talk. Instead, she shakes her head and mutters at me to get out again.
"For what it's worth, Cova, I am sorry your life went the way it did. I'm so sorry you lost your parents, I know exactly how that feels. I'm sorry you went into a system that didn't treat you right, and into the hands of someone you think you love..."
"I don't think I love him," she snaps. "I know I do!"
"How can you love someone who mistreats you? I want you to think about that. Think hard about it," I exhale and stand, walking towards the door. "If he loved you, he would have never hurt you, Cova. That's not love. It's control. He would have never purchased you. He would have never done any of the things he did. Love, it's so much purer than that. I'm not going to give up on you. You can scream and yell at me over and over, but I'm not going to give up on you. I love you. You're my sister. You're my family. I'll show you what real love feels like."
With that, I step out and shut the door.