Series: Fever Falls Series by Riley Hart
Total pages in book: 89
Estimated words: 85157 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 426(@200wpm)___ 341(@250wpm)___ 284(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 85157 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 426(@200wpm)___ 341(@250wpm)___ 284(@300wpm)
Fucking Cranky Campbell. He was ruining everything. What in the hell was it about him that tied me up in knots?
The bed dipped as he moved. Beau was in my bed. Granted, we were fully dressed, on top of the blankets, and I had no idea how to even make an attempt at anything with a guy, but he was there, beside me. I’d felt his breath on my skin as I slept. Felt his warmth. Maybe sort of wondered if he was hard right then, because my dick was apparently working again.
Holding my breath, I rolled over to my side, faced him, leaned up on my elbow, and looked down at him. The tension he often held in his face was gone as he slept. His lips were soft, this sort of half grin on them. It made me smile as I fought myself not to reach out and trace his mouth with my finger.
His hair was a dark mess. It was mostly straight, just the ends slightly wavy like they always were. My fingers tingled as I remember what it felt like.
I peeked down at the happy face on his arm, wanted to trace that with my finger too…maybe my tongue. Hmm. What would Beau’s skin taste like? How would it feel against mine?
My eyes traveled down his chest, his stomach, his bulge. Fuck, there was a guy with a hard-on in bed with me. What did he look like? Feel like? Smell like? Because yep, I suddenly wondered about the scent of Beau’s skin in those intimate places.
I’m gay, I’m gay, I’m gay.
My body had a whole lot easier time accepting it than my brain currently did.
My eyes began to make the journey upward again—stomach, chest, smile—“You fucker! You’re awake!”
“What? Me? No!” He opened his eyes when I playfully pushed him. “Okay, maybe, but can you blame me for soaking in the moment…and for giving you time?”
“Time to ogle you?”
“Time for whatever you need.”
Ugh. Because of course Beau would be understanding. “It’s easier to pretend, to lie to myself, when I’m not around you. It’s quite frustrating. If I didn’t like you, I’d hate you, which hey, I’m pretty sure you feel the same way. You’ve spent your life trying to pretend you hate me. That must mean you like me a lot.”
I might have been slightly emotionally stunted, because it was much easier to make it all about the maybe crush Beau had on me and the fact that I made him realize he was gay than focusing on myself. Oh, and making a joke out of things. Classic avoidance 101. I aced the class.
Beau leaned up on his elbow too, so we were facing each other. I waited for a joke, for him to roll his eyes or call me cocky because that was how we worked. We sniped at each other, were in competition with each other, but I could see by the gentleness in his eyes, that wasn’t where he was going to go with this.
“It wasn’t easy for me at first, Ash. Try to keep your head from getting too big here, but when you kissed me, everything sort of clicked into place. It was like a light bulb suddenly turned on, and I was like…ooh, this is why I couldn’t love Shan the way she loved me, why I didn’t get why sex was so awesome, and oh, why I hated Ashton Carmichael. I didn’t want to admit it. I didn’t want to believe it. Hell, I didn’t even know anyone who was gay. Fever Falls has grown a lot since then. We didn’t have Fever Street back then…well, it was there, but it wasn’t as fabulous.” He winked at me, and I grinned.
“I had to do a lot of soul searching…and I was scared out of my mind to come out to my mom, friends, people around town. But I did it in my own time and in my own way, and you will too. No one can tell you how or when to come to terms with this. You’re calling the play, Ash.”
“Sports reference for the win.”
“Stop making jokes.”
“Did you hook up with anyone after me?” The question just sort of tumbled out.
“Nope. I’m a virgin.”
“Smart-ass.”
“I waited a few weeks. I know that doesn’t sound like long, but I sort of started to get my head around it, and then I wanted to experiment. I told myself I had to do that before I came out. Some of it was probably not incredibly safe—I was going to Atlanta and hooking up with random guys—but I realized I was really fucking gay and I liked it. I met Lincoln right after. We both had fake IDs and were in a gay club. We were attracted to each other, but we weren’t compatible sexually. We’ve been best friends ever since.”