Filthy Little Secret Read online Devon McCormack

Categories Genre: Gay, GLBT, M-M Romance, Romance Tags Authors:
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Total pages in book: 74
Estimated words: 73828 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 369(@200wpm)___ 295(@250wpm)___ 246(@300wpm)
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“No, that’s not how I meant it. Sorry.”

“What? Now that things didn’t work out between you guys, you think you can come back here and say you’re sorry and everything will be all better?”

He sits beside me. “I fucked up, okay? I know that. I knew that when I started messing around with Morgan.”

“My best friend Morgan. Say it. My best friend since elementary school. You came between us, so you’re dead to me.”

“Mark, you’re nineteen. I’m twenty. We’re just getting started out. We’re going to make mistakes.”

“I can’t understand why this conversation is sounding a lot like you’re asking for more than for me to just forgive you.”

“Just listen to me. Let me tell you my side of it, and if when I’m done, you don’t want to hear any more, you never have to speak to me again, okay?”

“Fine. Whatever.”

He runs his thumb under his lip, the way he sometimes does when he’s thinking very hard about how to approach a problem. Like he used to do when he would do his homework in my room with me.

“When we first met, I fell for you hard. Really hard. And it scared me a lot. I’d asked you for help in chemistry, and you were so nice to come over and tutor me.”

I knew him from my mother, and I’d had a crush for a long time, so I wanted to get plowed. That’s the only reason I helped him out. If I’d known how things were going to play out, I would have taught him wrong so that he would’ve flunked.

“You remember when we would talk about studying for an exam, and every time I was supposed to be studying, I ended up making up some excuse or wanting to go watch a movie instead? Sometimes I do things to sabotage myself. I know what’s the right thing, and especially if I’m worried about failing, then I just…fuck things up. Like with Morgan, I was trying to sabotage our relationship—the one good thing I had in my life. The best thing I ever had in my life.”

What a load of bullshit.

I should have interrupted him the moment I detected the ridiculous analogy, but I wanted to give him a chance to speak his piece so I could be one hundred percent sure it was as moronic and horrible as I believed it would be.

“You’re a dumb sack of shit,” I say.

“What?” he asks, his eyes narrow with confusion.

“Did you think that would do the trick? That I would be totally cool after a little false epiphany about you sabotaging shit in your life?”

“Dude, I know—”

“Dude? Dude? You did not just call me dude.”

I rise from the bed, my cheeks filling with heat. I’m so fucking mad I might fucking deck him. He stands, raising his hands before him. “No, please, Mark. Just hear me out.”

“What is there left to hear, Greg? You sabotaged our relationship because you were scared it was going to work out? Are you kidding me? Sabotaging a relationship is not listening when the other person talks or forgetting birthdays. Not fucking their best friend behind their back for two months. At least.”

He tries to interrupt me, but I don’t stop: “No. I’m glad you wanted to talk to me about this because it lets me know just how good of a decision I made, and most importantly, it lets me know what an asshole you are. I can’t even remember what I saw in you. I thought I was so lucky to be the new kid with the guy who had everything. But you don’t have everything. You don’t even know who the fuck you are or what you want out of life. You ride off your parents’ money and do whatever the fuck feels good to you in the moment. No responsibility. No cares in the world. Some people might think that’s a nice life, but it’s an empty one. You can fuck all the guys in the world you want, but one day you’re going to realize how lonely you really are.”

I storm out of the bedroom. He grips my shoulder, but I shrug him off and keep going.

I spin around. “Don’t fucking follow me. Give me a second to leave. It’s the least you can fucking do.”

He steps back and sits on the bed.

I don’t have another second to waste on this asshole.

16

TIM

I wait in the stairwell, listening to see if Mark needs me.

He and Greg headed upstairs a little while ago. As much as I’m worried about Mark’s feelings, I’m also scared as fuck. Since Greg and Morgan called things off recently, I’m wondering if he’s trying to win Mark back. What if Mark makes up with him? What if he figures Greg just made a mistake and that it’s something they can work through? I keep telling myself I’ll miss the sex, but that’s not all I’ll miss. I’ll miss Mark’s pretty face and those beautiful blue eyes. I’ll miss our talks and joking about Roxxxy Andrews with him.


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