Total pages in book: 59
Estimated words: 56208 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 281(@200wpm)___ 225(@250wpm)___ 187(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 56208 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 281(@200wpm)___ 225(@250wpm)___ 187(@300wpm)
That stabs me like a knife. But I force one step in front of the other. It reminds me of when I was walking out of the cult, just one foot, then another, doing my best to leave the past behind. I don’t want to leave Emery or Gray behind—I want to sit in that petal-covered library and sip our drinks as we wait for our little waitress to make us dinner. I want to bond with Gray and Emery. I want to make promises about the future. I want to commit.
That means a lot from a woman who’s spent almost the entire last decade running.
Chapter Twenty-One
Gray
Emery says nothing during dinner, staring down at her plate. At least she’s stopped crying. All during her bedtime routine, she’s silent. When she goes to bed, and I ask her if she wants me to read her a story, she just shakes her head and rolls over, pushing her face into the pillow. I feel like the world’s biggest jackass, but at the same time, what was I supposed to do? Let Callie tell Emery that she loves her? Let Emery believe that she could play Cupid and push me and Callie together?
I love her. We both love Callie.
That’s one hell of a mindfuck. It’s like my baby saw right into my heart. But I don’t love Callie, do I? A man can’t fall in love in such a short amount of time. Callie’s special, interesting, funny, intelligent, strong, captivating, magnetic. She’s beautiful. She’s the most enthralling woman I’ve ever met. But love?
I find myself standing at the rear window, looking across the yard, past the vegetation, to the guesthouse. The front light is on as if she’s calling to me. I watch as her silhouette passes across the glass. She looks like she’s rushing around like she’s… is that a suitcase in her arms? I lean against the glass, my heartbeat suddenly speeding up.
I’m about to walk out there when my cell phone rings. It’s Sloane. I don’t want to answer, but I haven’t got much choice. I need to know where her twisted thoughts are at. “Let’s meet tomorrow,” she says, no hello or greeting.
I grit my teeth. No, you psycho. But despite what else is true about her, I can’t speak to the mother of my child like that. “For what?” I ask.
“I want to speak in person. One-on-one, when I’m not drunk or…”
“High?” I say.
“I didn’t handle the other night very well. I’ll fully admit to that.”
I sigh. What else can I say? “Where? When?”
“In the city. Lunch?”
“Okay, Sloane.”
If I can keep things civilized with Sloane, maybe I can stop her from doing something drastic. The last thing I need is for her to start legal proceedings. But at the same time, meeting her is the last thing I want to do.
Setting up the baby monitor in Emery’s room, I leave the house and walk through the yard. My hand is trembling when I knock on the door. I can hear Callie on the other side, rushing around.
“Yes?” she calls, a tremor in her voice.
“It’s me.”
“Yes?” she says again.
I grit my teeth. “Can I come in?”
“Is that a good idea?”
“What are you doing? It looks like you’re packing.”
“That’s because I am packing.”
I grab the door handle and turn it when I find it’s not locked. She spins, facing me. She’s changed into sweatpants and a baggy T-shirt, no bra. But I can’t think about that right now. I can’t let the savage part of me take over and start obsessing over her. I can’t let myself snap.
“I didn’t say you needed to leave,” I growl.
She throws her hands up. “What else are we supposed to do, exactly? You heard her—you saw her. She’s built this whole life in her head, Gray. She thinks we’re going to be together and live happily ever after. That was just plain tragic, the hope in her eyes. Her plan was so cute, so endearing. I could see how proud she was.”
Despite myself, I smile. “Yeah, she was bubbling with pride, wasn’t she?”
“But don’t you see? That’s not a good thing. It’s just another reason why I have to make the grown-up decision. Do you think I want to do this? This job is the best I’ve ever had, and you…” She clears her throat. “You…”
I stride across the room and take her hands in mine. She clutches onto me with something like desperation. “What?” I groan.
“You know what,” she whispers.
I lean down. Our noses brush. An instinctive smile takes hold of her lips, a laugh almost escaping her before she stops herself. It’s like she knows she has to kill any intimacy between us before it grows into something unmanageable. I should do the same. But then I slide my hand across her back and press her against me.