Total pages in book: 123
Estimated words: 115468 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 577(@200wpm)___ 462(@250wpm)___ 385(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 115468 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 577(@200wpm)___ 462(@250wpm)___ 385(@300wpm)
“Where do you picture yourself finding this sort of peace?”
“I don’t know.” I considered that as a little more of the sun slipped away. “I told you about that pull I’ve always felt.” I paused. “I haven’t experienced it since I’ve been here. But it’s like…I don’t fit here either.” I let out a frustrated exhale. “I don’t know where I belong.”
His eyes washed over my features, settling on my mouth for a moment and then moving away. “Maybe it’s not about a place, so much as…a person, or…people. Your people.” He reached out and took my hand. “We’ll figure out who they are, Rory.” He paused. “No matter what.”
No matter what.
I knew what that meant.
I nodded and looked to the side, but the warmth of his hand brought me comfort and I didn’t want to pull away and so I didn’t. “It makes me feel sort of guilty to even think like that. Because, I have people. I have two uncles who love me and have sacrificed everything for me.”
Gage tilted his head, his brow furrowing. “You told me they stepped in when your mother died. How old were they?”
“Cash was twenty-six and already settled into his career. But Romeo, he was only eighteen. He was about to leave Mud Gulch right before my mother died, but…well, he canceled his plans and he stayed. Not only for me, but for the bar that my mother had run after my granny died. Uncle Cassius helped, but he’s away more often than he’s not.” I felt a pang in my gut the way I always did when I thought about it.
Gage was silent for a moment as I used my other hand to play with the hem of my shirt. “He sacrificed for you. He’s obviously a stand-up guy.”
I blew out a breath. “He is. But…he obviously felt a pull too and he never answered it. He sacrificed for me—for all of us—when he was so young. He was going to see the world. Heck, he might have taken it over.” And instead, he was stuck behind a bar in Mud Gulch, Maine. “Maybe he still can. If…”
“If?”
I raised my eyes to meet his. “It’s not my driving motivation, but…if I have a father of means, then maybe I can give back to Romeo. Cassius too, but Cassius is happy with where he is.” If I believed that my mom had a hand in leading me here, then wouldn’t she also want Romeo to benefit if my father saw fit to assist me financially in helping Romeo regain those lost years?
“Ah. You want to send Romeo on that world adventure he was about to go on when instead, he ended up having to stay home and raise his niece.”
“It wasn’t fair,” I whispered.
“For any of you. But, Rory, I highly doubt he’s looking to be repaid. I don’t know your uncle, but the way you talk about him, I can tell he’s a great guy.”
“He is. He’s the best. He’d never complain.”
“Maybe it’s because he doesn’t have any complaints.”
I sighed. “He’d never voice them, but years ago, I found his drawer of travel brochures. Italy, Switzerland, Egypt…all the places he never got to see.”
He was quiet for a moment as he obviously considered the picture I was painting. “If you do find your father and end up being able to send Romeo on those adventures, what will you do?”
“I’ll go back to Mud Gulch and run the bar. It’s been in our family for generations. It’s a staple of the town. There’s no way I’d let it go.”
Gage looked up, staring at the stars that had just begun dotting the sky. “You’re torn in two directions,” he said.
I thought about that. Yes. Yes, that’s exactly how I felt. I felt loyal to Mud Gulch and to my uncles, but I also felt torn to be somewhere else, even if I hadn’t quite identified where that was just yet. For so long, deep inside, I’d felt like I was ignoring a call I needed to heed. That feeling had subsided here, and yet I still hadn’t found what I was looking for, and so I remained just as lost.
“What about you?” I asked. “Where do you picture yourself finding peace like this? Is it a place or a…person?”
He glanced at me and then away. “I honestly don’t know. I’ve never thought about my life in terms of peace. I’ve always been guided by my actions, more so than my feelings.”
“Feelings? You mean dreams?”
He tilted his head, appearing momentarily confused. Then he shrugged. “Yeah, I guess. Feelings. Dreams. I’ve never used those terms. I have goals, and I have aspirations, of course. But dreams? What’s the real difference? To me, they’ve always been pretty synonymous.”
I thought about that for a second. “I’m not sure. All I know is that dreams are what create peace like this. You can sense it, can’t you? This is Haven’s dream come true, and she puts her whole heart and soul into it.” I waved my arm around. “I guess if you can find a way to monetize your dreams like she obviously does, you’re pretty damn lucky.”