Total pages in book: 87
Estimated words: 85135 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 426(@200wpm)___ 341(@250wpm)___ 284(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 85135 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 426(@200wpm)___ 341(@250wpm)___ 284(@300wpm)
I shake my head. “So we’re not committed to any dates, other than the ones you just described—the five we’ve already sold tickets for.”
“Right. We haven’t really looked at Europe outside of London, or Asia. We were right in the middle of those discussions when all the stuff with Matt…” He trails off.
“Yup. So we don’t lose any money if we don’t want to do any more dates than the five we’ve already booked.”
“We’re not forfeiting a deposit or anything like that, but at the same time, you’re going to be rehearsing and employing staff and crew and you’re not going to make any money if you only do those dates. But that’s not what you’re saying, right?”
“I still want to perform the album,” I say.
“Phew,” Tommy says, grinning and dramatically wiping his brow.
“But I was thinking I don’t really want to be on the road for a year doing a big stadium tour.”
Tommy pulls in a breath and starts fiddling with his phone. “Just to remind you that Taylor’s Eras tour is set to pull in one-point-four billion in gross receipts. That girl is a fucking baller.”
“You’ll get no argument from me on that,” I say. “But I’m not in competition with Taylor.”
“Erm, no,” Tommy says. “But—”
“And I don’t want to be on the road for a year and a half. What am I going to do with a billion dollars? I already have more money than I could ever want.”
Everyone assumed I’d tour this album since I didn’t tour my last one. People started making plans without really consulting me. I get it. I’m not blaming them. But it doesn’t mean I’m going to go along with their plans.
“I was thinking of doing a limited number of smaller venues,” I say. “The new album is more intimate than some of my other records, and I’d like to have more of a sense of how people are enjoying it.” I’m not sure how this is going to go down with Tommy. He’s ambitious for me, which is part of the reason he’s such a great manager, but I’m not sure I want the same things he wants for me.
He narrows his eyes. “When you say smaller venues, what are you talking about? The Barclays Center or Radio City?”
I shrug. “Actually, I was thinking smaller.”
“Smaller than Radio City? It’s got a six-thousand-seat capacity. At the moment you’re booked into the Met Life Stadium, which has a capacity of eighty thousand.”
“I’m not saying we cancel the venues we’ve already booked. We can do those. And then supplement with more intimate shows.”
“Like where?” he asks.
I’m almost afraid to say. This has clearly come out of left field for Tommy, but for me it’s been a long time coming. “I was thinking something like…Blue Note.”
“The jazz club?” Felicity asks.
“You won’t make any money,” Tommy says. “That’s got a three-hundred-seat capacity.”
I pull in a breath. “Yeah. I think that sounds…right.”
“Is it the touring you don’t want to do? The traveling? We could look into a Vegas residency.”
I shake my head. I can’t think of anything worse than playing the same show to the same audience for weeks on end. That’s definitely not what I want to do. “No, I don’t want to do Vegas. And yes, the traveling is part of the reason I don’t want to do a big tour. But it’s more than that. I don’t enjoy it. I don’t like how it feels like my life is on hold for eighteen months. I can’t ever write on tour because I’m so exhausted. And I’m not saying you can’t connect to the audience—of course you do—but it’s not like it used to be in the old days when I was just starting out.”
“Darling, it’s never going to be how it was in the old days,” Felicity says.
“I know. But at the same time, I don’t want to do a stadium tour just because that’s what’s expected of me, or because that will take my career to the next level, or because I want to set gross revenue records. I want to do the next thing because that’s what will make me happy. I don’t want to let you down, Tommy, and I love that you want everything for me, but I don’t want the next big thing because it’s bigger than the last big thing. I want what comes next to make me happy.”
Beau is a perfect example of someone finding the balance between obligation and joy. He’s a doctor, but he doesn’t feel obligated to stand still and practice medicine how everyone else does. He does it his way. He puts his happiness first and doesn’t let others’ expectations dictate his life. It’s inspiring.
He is inspiring.
Tommy takes a breath, and I brace myself for his reaction. Yes, he works for me, but he’s been with me from the beginning and I don’t want him to be disappointed. “I agree. If a huge tour won’t make you happy, don’t do it. You don’t have to tour this album at all if you don’t want to.”